


i won't hesitate (for you)

by doc_pickles



Series: Hesitate Universe [1]
Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: F/M, Fix It Fic, as usual, family fic, jo centric, jolex, jolex babies, this is a fix it fic that got very out of hand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:41:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,831
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25316968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doc_pickles/pseuds/doc_pickles
Summary: Jo is happy, at least she feels like she is. When someone from her past shows up, will her and her daughter's world ever go back to normal? Or will things change for good?
Relationships: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson Karev
Series: Hesitate Universe [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2035189
Comments: 50
Kudos: 100





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> soooo this is kinda just a teaser chapter for a new fic but i hope you guys like it! like it says above this is just a fix it fic that got blown out of proportion. anyways enjoy!

Snow is falling constantly these days. It’s mid January in Seattle and Jo is rushing to get into Grey Sloan before the thick sheets of snow completely soak her through her coat. Once inside, she pulls down her hood and shakes her short locks out. She then reaches down to pull off the hood of the smaller body clutched to her chest.

“You okay baby?”

The little girl looked up at Jo and nodded, her chestnut colored curls bouncing as she did so. Jo pressed a kiss to her forehead, then headed towards the daycare center. The sun hadn’t begun to shine over Seattle yet, but Jo and the little girl in her arms were both used to being on an early schedule.

“Mommy got lucky and has a short shift today, so we can go out for lunch after,” Jo grinned at the girl, who wore an almost identical grin. “Does that sound fun my Harper girl?”

“Snack?”

Laughing at her daughters enthusiasm for food, Jo opened the door to the daycare and turned back to Harper. For all the personality traits that Harper had inherited from her mother, she definitely had her father’s appetite. A pang of sadness hit Jo, which she brushed away as she worked on removing the bulky coat from Harper’s small form.

“Yes baby, there’ll be lots of snacks,” Jo kissed her head again, staring down into her hazel eyes. “I’ll be back so soon, you have fun with your friends!”

Harper ran off as soon as her feet hit the ground, immediately headed for the block table. Jo watched her for a minute more, her daughters tiny hands stacking brightly colored blocks until they fell down. Harper was smart as a whip though and began to rebuild the wooden structure with more caution and ease.

Jo’s pager broke her out of her reverie, her eyes flitting to where the message to come to the East side nurses station was blinking. She was still a bit early for rounds, so she walked down the halls of Grey Sloan and sidled up to the station with ease.

“Hey Elaine,” Jo smiled brightly at the older woman behind the desk. “You paged for me?”

Elaine looked up, her eyes filled with sympathy for a moment before they flashed their normal neutral expression. Elaine wasn’t one to get involved in hospital drama, so Jo knew something was wrong when the nurse flashed her the pained look.

“Yes, someone’s looking for you Doctor Karev,” Elaine pointed behind Jo, towards the waiting area. “He’s sitting right there in the green jacket.”

Jo turned around, her heart going from a normal steady beat to an erratic rhythm in mere seconds. His hair was a bit shorter, his face tired and looking older, but clean shaven how she had always liked it. As Jo turned to look at him, his eyes met hers and it took everything in her not to fall to the floor.

“Alex.”


	2. Chapter Two

Jo’s feet are unmoving as she looked at Alex for the first time in almost three years. He was getting up now, walking over to her, standing in front of her, but she couldn’t seem to move or speak. She couldn’t tell if her body was frozen in horror or anger or shock, but she wasn’t processing anything around her besides the man coming towards her.

“Jo, you look good,” Alex smiled. He’s standing three feet away, far enough that she can’t touch him, but close enough that Jo feels like she’s suffocating. “Can we talk?”

The three words snap something in Jo’s brain. Before she knows it, she’s stepping forward and her hand is flying up to slap Alex across the face. He’s staring at her with wide eyes, his own hand holding his face with a bewildered expression. She’s thankful that it’s early in the morning still because there’s no audience to watch them. 

“Are you kidding me?! You walked out on me! And you told me in a damn letter, then you show up out of the blue three years later. So no Alex, we cannot talk,” Jo’s voice is seething with anger as she turns and walks away from Alex. Her breathing was uneven and she felt like she was going to pass out. 

Jo burst into the first bathroom she stumbled upon, making a beeline for a stall as her breakfast came up again. She leant against the edge of the seat as tears tracked down her face, her mind swirling as she thought back to three years ago. 

_ ‘Oh, you deserve everything good in this life, Jo. I hope you find so much better than me. Thank you. I'm sorry. I don't know how to end this. I don't want to.  _

_ Goodbye.' _

_ Jo read the words, but didn’t believe what they were saying. Couldn’t believe them, because each and every one sent a dagger straight to her heart. Alex was gone, living on a fucking farm with Izzie Stevens of all people.  _

_ “This can’t be happening, this is not happening,” Jo’s muttering the words to herself, almost as if repeating them will bring Alex back to her. Her chest is tight and she knows that she’s having an anxiety attack, but she can’t move her body. _

_ Jo is shocked out of her daze by the timer on her phone blaring loudly. She slapped it off and looked at the bathroom counter, her eyes shifting to the three pieces of plastic that all told her the same thing.  _

_ Yes, Alex might have kids in Kansas, but he also has one here, in Seattle.  _

_ Nausea wells up inside of her and Jo is scrambling for the toilet bowl, barely making it before everything she ate that morning is reappearing before her. Tears sting her eyes as she leaned against the cold porcelain, wondering exactly how she ended up where she is.  _

_ No husband, no family, and about to become a single mother.  _

Jo couldn’t dwell on that, she had written Alex out of her life a long time ago. When the stick turned blue Jo knew that she would raise her baby alone. She had come to grips with that before she held her daughter in her arms for the first time. And now… now Alex was back. Here. In Seattle. In this hospital, where so many of their best memories had taken place.

Jo splashed water onto her face and stared at herself in the mirror. She met her own eyes in the mirror and let out a deep breath. She could do this, she was off early and she would take her daughter out to eat and not think about Alex. 

Of course, as soon as she stepped out of the bathroom he was standing there, cheek flaming red and eyes downcast. When he heard her exit, Alex looked up at Jo with an embarrassed expression. 

“I deserve that, I really do. But I just wanna talk with you Jo,” Alex is walking behind Jo down the hallways now, following as she navigated her way through the hospital he once called home. “Five minutes, please.”

The two of them stepped onto an elevator together, the only passengers as luck would have it, and Jo turned to Alex as soon as the door shut. He looked a little older, as if the past two years had worn him down tremendously, but he was still the same man Jo had fallen in love with. 

“You kept my last name,” Alex muttered, causing Jo to look away from him. “I didn’t think you would.”   
“I didn’t want to file the paperwork for a name change again,” Jo breathed out. Truthfully, she had kept her last name for Harper. “Alex you broke my heart, you shattered it into pieces after you said you wouldn’t leave me and then you did. You left me for Izzie and your kids and I-”

“They’re not mine,” Alex’s eyes went from Jo to the floor. “The kids. They’re… Izzie lied to me. They didn’t even know who I was, never heard of me before. But I pushed that aside and tried my best to be there for them and for her. And then one of them had Neurofibromatosis, it’s only passed down genetically so we both got tested and… Izzie confessed that she didn’t use the embryos like she told me. Hooked up with some guy at a bar, lied to me to get me back. So I left.”

“Well excuse me if I’m not full of sympathy for you Alex,” Jo’s tone was cold, but her heart was aching at the fact that Alex had missed so much of his own daughter's life trying to be a dad to kids that weren’t even his own. “That doesn’t change what happened between you and I.”

“I just, please Jo,” Alex’s tone is pleading at this point, but Jo refused to look at him. His eyes are the same ones she had looked into for the last two years as she tucked her baby girl into bed. If she looked at him again, she knew she'd break. “I screwed up, I know I don’t deserve a second chance but… I miss you Jo. So much.”

Jo was about to rip into Alex when the elevator stopped in place. Both occupants were jostled as they looked around. The lights were still on, so they hadn’t lost power, but an alarm was blaring above them. Jo’s pager came to life and she stared down at the screen in confusion. 

“What’s a code silver,” Jo looked at Alex whose face had lost all color, his pupils blown wide with fear. “Alex. What’s a code silver?”

“Uh, it’s a,” Alex was breathing heavily, one arm coming up to cover the side of his chest. “It’s an active shooter. There’s a shooter in the hospital, Jo.”

“No no, no this can’t be happening,” Jo couldn't stop the panic that began to rush through her body. She turned to the doors of the elevator and began banging on them. “Help! Someone please help!”

“Jo, you’re gonna be much safer in here then out there,” Alex put his hand on Jo’s shoulder, but it didn’t stop her from slamming her fists into the door harder. Alex finally wrapped his arms around her body, pulling her hands away from the door before she bloodied them. “Jo! Step back, they’re not going to open until the hospital is cleared. It’s okay.”

Jo began to panic then, her body slumping onto the ground as her breaths began to come out unevenly. Alex went down with her, his grip around her still strong as he held her close to his chest.

“I have to get out there,” Jo gasped, but her body wasn’t fighting the panic anymore. She leaned into the pain just as much as she was leaning into Alex. “I have to go, Alex I have to get out.”

“We’re not going anywhere, probably for a while,” Alex’s voice low and soothing now. “Your patients can wait, everyone is probably sheltering in place. It’s gonna be okay.”

Jo’s mind began to race and all she could think about is if Harper was okay. The alarms alone were probably scaring her to death, not to mention the panic and palpable fear that everyone was feeling. Jo wanted to say something, but that would entail her telling Alex that he has an actual daughter that he hasn’t met.

In a moment, for the first time in three years, Jo didn’t feel anger towards Alex. She felt regret, because she should have called Alex when she found out she was pregnant or when she was in labor or when Harper turned one or anytime between. And she didn’t because she was so damn angry at him for leaving her when she needed him most. 

“You don’t understand. I messed up,” Jo sniffled, holding back tears she desperately wanted to shed. “I screwed up so bad, you’re going to be so angry with me.”

“Jo, I left you to be with a woman I hadn’t seen in a decade and kids that weren’t even mine,” Alex chuckled dryly. “I don’t think you can do much worse than that.”

Logically, Jo knew that someday she would have to tell Alex about his daughter. She had pictured the moment countless times, envisioned exactly what she would say to him. Jo had spent every moment since she found out she was pregnant thinking about what Alex would say and what she would say to him. But in all that time, she had never imagined it would be in the hospital elevator during an active shooting. 

“Alex, I…,” Jo wiped her eyes quickly before looking up at Alex. “When you left Seattle, I was pregnant. I was pregnant and I gave birth and now we have a daughter downstairs in daycare who’s probably so scared and I need to get out of here to make sure she’s okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking around!! I have more Jolex fics on my tumblr: doc-pickles!!


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay WOW yall like this one huh? full disclosure: 1. this chapter got a major rewrite this morning so sorry if it sucks and 2. I haven’t written past chapter four fully so updates after this one will be a bit more spaced out as I try to flesh this story out more. thanks for the comments and love, I appreciate it!!
> 
> ALSO WARNING: minor adult content at the end of this chapter :)

_ “One more big push Jo, you got this!” _

_ Jo’s whole body was in pain, but she put as much energy as she could into pushing and was granted with a rush of relief flooding her body. She let her body fall back, Meredith rubbing her shoulder and congratulating her. Suddenly, a small cry rang through the room and Jo felt more alert than she had in hours.  _

_ “Are they okay? Is my baby okay?” _

_ “She is perfection, Jo,” Carina smiled at Jo, placing the tiny screaming baby on Jo’s chest. A head already full of wispy curls greeted Jo’s sight as she held the baby against her tightly. A soft hand rests on Jo’s shoulder and she has to tell her brain that it’s not Alex, that he isn’t here to meet his daughter like she so desperately wished he was. _

_ “You look just like your daddy,” Meredith mused, looking over Jo’s shoulder at the infant. “You have his nose and chin.”  _

_ “And by how long it took you to get here I’m gonna guess you’re just as stubborn,” Jo laughed wetly as she looked down at her daughter. “Meredith, say hello to your goddaughter, Harper Josephine Karev.” _

_ “Oh, Jo…,” Meredith looked down at her friend, noting the watery expression she wore. “You shouldn’t have to…” _

_ “I wanted to,” Jo sighed as she stroked her daughter's head. “She deserves a last name that means something. No matter what happened between Alex and I, she deserves to know she has a family who loves her.” _

Jo couldn’t stop thinking about the day she brought  _ their _ daughter into the world. How when her water broke while her and Meredith were doing post op rounds she had cried for Alex and then continued to cry when she realized he wasn’t there. How she had dialed his number four times but couldn’t click the call button. How she held her daughter close to her body for hours after she was born because the little heart beating under her fingers was half her and half Alex. 

And now Alex was sitting next to her in an elevator while their daughter was somewhere else in this hospital scared and confused. Jo couldn’t help but wonder if God was punishing her for everything she had done wrong.

“Alex, I’m so sorry,” Jo sighed. He hadn’t said anything since she had told him that he really was a father. “I should’ve called you and I didn’t and-”

“Why are you apologizing?”

Looking up from her hands, Jo noted that instead of an angry expression, Alex looked sad. She can’t imagine why, she lied to him and kept his daughter from him for three years. She had done exactly what Izzie had done to him. Well, what he thought she had done anyways.

“Jo, I left  _ you _ , you had every right not to tell me you were pregnant. I would’ve been upset too if I was in your shoes. If I hadn’t left we would be raising our daughter together right now,” Alex sighed, running a hand through his hair as he looked down at his feet. “I’m trying to be mad with you but I can’t. These past few years have been eye opening to me, they made me realize that I made a mistake when I left you. When everything with Izzie’s kids happened, I realized nothing was stopping me from coming home anymore. I came straight to the hospital from the airport because I needed to talk to you. 

I’m so sorry for leaving you, I was confused and upset and I… I didn’t think about you. And I am so sorry for that, more than I can tell you,” Alex looked at Jo, whose cheeks were wet with tears. He grabbed her hands and looked her in the eyes, his voice uneven as he spoke again. “I keep apologizing but it’s all I can do right now. I wish I could take the past three years back more than anything but I know I can't do that and you’re probably still pissed at me. But I want to be there for you and our daughter, if you’ll let me.”

Jo nodded, swallowing thickly because her brain couldn’t quite think straight yet. Before she said anything she might regret, she stood and went back to banging on the doors. She needed a distraction to stop her from absolutely losing because she was on the verge of a breakdown. She didn’t like to admit it, but motherhood had made her soft.

“Please somebody, open the damn doors,” Jo’s voice is louder this time, her voice more urgent. “Damn it I don’t even know what floor we’re on or what we’re near. We could be anywhere in this death trap!”

“They didn’t call it Seattle Grace Mercy Death for nothing,” Alex chuckled. “We could be stuck here for hours and there’s no cell reception in these metal boxes. You should sit down, you’re gonna wear yourself out banging on those doors.”

Jo pressed herself against the cool metal of the door, closing her eyes and taking deep breaths as she tried to calm her breathing. Her heart began to beat out of time and her breathing became shallow. Jo could feel the overwhelming panic and anxiety she had been trying so hard to push down finally rising up. 

“What’s her name?”

Alex’s voice was soft and calming, breaking through Jo’s overwhelming thoughts and bringing her back to reality. She felt slightly relieved that she was stuck here with him instead of someone else. Even after all this time, he was still able to calm her better than anyone.

“Harper. Harper Josephine Karev,” Jo opened her eyes again to watch Alex’s face soften. “She needed a last name that meant something.”

“Birthday?”

“July 31, five days past her due date.”

“Does she like princesses? When Zola was her age she was obsessed with them.”

“She watches Moana every night before bed,” Jo laughed as she slid down the cool elevator doors to sit next to Alex again. “I think even at two she could say the whole script from memory.”

“Do you have pictures? I know I don’t deserve anything from you right now, but I at least wanna see if she looks anything like me,” Alex shrugged. 

“She looks exactly like you,” Jo pulled her phone out and found a photo, passing it to Alex. “This is her last week when she got her hair cut. She was so excited because I promised her we could get ice cream after.”

Alex stared at the photo in awe, Harper’s wide grin highlighting the Karev features of her face. Her nose, chin, and eyes were all Alex. But her smile and the cheekbones above it and sparkle behind her eyes were all her mother. Alex teared up looking at the perfect mix of him and the woman he loved.  _ Loves _ . 

“Jo, she’s,” Alex smiled as he looked up at Jo, his eyes watery and tears hitting his cheek. “God she’s perfect. You did good.”

Jo nodded, she didn’t think she could say anything tangible at the moment. But she was stressed and Alex showing up had thrown her for a loop and there’s someone with a gun outside the elevator doors, someone that could be in the same room as her baby. 

“I’m so scared, I don’t think I’ve ever been this terrified in my life, not even when Harper was born,” Jo’s voice trembled as she looked at Alex. “I- she’s down there all alone. She must be so scared! She’s only two, she doesn’t understand what’s happening. Harper is afraid of the dark, she’s probably crying and and-”

Jo had finally descended into full hysterics, tears that she had been holding back all morning springing to her eyes as she began to sob. Alex moved forward, wrapping his arms around her as he comforted her the best he knew how. 

“Jo, she’s gonna be okay. I lived through one of these shootings, I’ve done this before, you know that,” Alex took a deep breath and turned to look into Jo’s eyes. His fingers moved to wipe away the tears on Jo’s cheeks as she took a deep breath. “And you… well if Harper is anything like you, she’s a fighter. And she’s gonna do fine. I can’t stop you from worrying, but I can help distract you.”

Jo looked up into Alex’s eyes, her breathing calming slightly. She knew she should be mad, furious even, that Alex left her and their baby girl. But… the rational part of Jo’s brain was turned off, her body running on pure adrenaline. Right now she was just grateful that Alex was there to comfort her. 

“Alex…,” the name came out breathy as they stared at each other. Jo couldn’t help herself as she leaned forward and captured Alex’s lips with her own. Her hands came up to hold his face, fingers tracing over the light layer of stubble as Alex’s own hands met her waist. 

She missed this, the feel of him so close to her. Jo revelled in the warmth that Alex was radiating as he pulled her fully onto his lap, his arms wrapping firmly around her. One of his hands snaked up and under her top, brushing against the underside of her breast and then going fully under her bra to squeeze her and pinch her nipple. 

Jo melted into Alex’s touch, her own hand slipping down and palming him through his jeans. She was quick to pull the zipper down and thrust her hand inside, her fingers running over him eagerly as if trying to make up for their time apart. 

“Jo,” Alex barely got her name out, his hand having gone from her breast down to the waistband of her jeans. His fingers were poised to unzip them, merely waiting for her response. “You sure?”

“Please,” Jo moaned as her eyes fluttered back open to meet his. “Alex, please. Don’t make me ask again.”

At Jo’s insistence, Alex continued what he had been doing. The duo collapsed onto the floor in a tangle of limbs, filling the small space with their moans and the sounds of their clothes hitting the floor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find more of my writing on tumblr: doc-pickles


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay this was supposed to be two chapters but the first part was so short that i combined them so... you're welcome!

_ “Harper baby you gotta stop crying, please I’ve tried everything,” Jo is crying alongside her daughter as she attempts to calm her down. She was fed and changed and had burped even, but the colicky two month old wouldn’t calm down. “I’m sorry bubba. I’m trying as best as I can and I really wish your daddy was here to help, but it’s just us.” _

_ Harper calmed down for a moment, looking up at Jo, before she opened her mouth and projectile vomited onto her mom’s shirt.  _

_ “Lovely. This is just what I needed,” Jo groaned, propping Harper on the pillows of her bed as she changed her shirt. She glanced over to Alex’s dresser, laying untouched and dusty in the corner, and walked over to it. She opened the bottom drawer, digging through the clothes before she found what she was searching for.  _

_ Jo pulled the ratty Iowa State shirt over her head, pausing for a moment longer than she probably should as she took in the scent that still lingered in the fabric.  _

_ “Okay see Harper girl, everything is gonna be okay,” Jo picked her daughter up again, cradling the infant against her body as her screams lowered more and more until she was fast asleep. “It’s okay, you and I? We got this. We’re gonna be okay.” _

It’s another two hours before the code is lifted and still an extra thirty minutes before the elevator begins to move again. Jo sat with her head leaning against Alex’s shoulder when the elevator moved and the doors opened, revealing that they had been 15 feet from the surgical floor the whole time. Bailey and Meredith stood in the doorway now, both looking relieved and confused. 

“Jo!”

“Meredith!”

“Karev?”

“Bailey.”

“Alex…”

“Mer…”

“Jo,” Bailey’s voice was calm and steady. “Downstairs just called, your daughter is fine. Shooter was on the psych floor, the hospital is up and running again.”

Jo thinks she began laughing, that’s what she heard at least, but then she felt the wet tears streaming down her face and she’s not quite sure what’s happening. She let out a relieved sigh as she turned to Alex, who was grinning widely. 

“Told you she’d be fine,” Alex reassured her. 

“Oh my god. You told him about Harper in an elevator. In my freaking elevator,” Meredith interrupted. She paused, leaned into the elevator and sniffed loudly before glaring at the duo. “You two had sex in  _ my _ elevator?!” 

Alex and Jo both began to laugh at Meredith’s face, loud peels of laughter ringing through the elevator as Bailey and Meredith stared on with unamused looks on their faces. 

“Well when you’re done giggling like a teenager, you’re free to go,” Bailey directed the words toward Jo. “I’m sending everyone home, you’ll be on call but you’re of no use to me right now. Go get your kid. Alex, I assume that I’ll see you on Monday morning in my office.”

Bailey walked away, leaving Meredith looking in on the duo still sitting in the elevator. She looked from Jo to Alex, meeting eyes with her best friend that she hadn’t seen in almost three years. 

“You owe me a huge explanation, Evil Spawn,” Meredith grinned as she turned away from the elevator. “Give my goddaughter kisses from Auntie Mer!”

Jo stood and yelled a goodbye to Meredith before pressing the button for the first floor, standing in front of the door anxiously as the elevator began to go down. 

“Glad to see some things never change,” Alex laughed, standing behind Jo and resting his hands on her shoulders. “She’s fine Jo, you heard Bailey. Harper is okay.”

Jo found herself nodding, but she felt like she wasn’t in control of her body as her and Alex walked through the quiet lobby and hallways towards the daycare. There was a crowd of parents standing outside the door, each waiting nervously for their child to appear. Jo’s nervous energy prompted her to bounce on her feet as she craned her neck to try and see her daughter. 

“Mama!”

Jo’s head whipped around, seeing a blur of pink stripes and brown curls flying towards her. Harper’s feet were moving through the crowd and towards Jo, who knelt down to catch her daughter. 

“Oh Harper girl, you’re okay,” tears poured down Jo’s cheeks as she hugged Harper to her chest. “I was so scared. You’re okay, you’re here.”

Jo was so focused on the feeling of relief coursing through her body that she didn’t even realize that Harper was talking. Jo pulled back, her heart skipping a beat as she heard the word her daughter was saying. 

“Daddy. Daddy, daddy!”

Harper lifted one finger to point directly at Alex, who stood shell shocked looking at the little girl. She definitely looked like a Karev and she knew who he was. There was no guessing, no hoping, no trying too hard to impress her. Harper knew that Alex was her dad. Alex dropped to his knees next to Jo, gathering both girls into his arms and breathing out a sigh of relief. 

“I am never leaving this death trap hospital again,” Alex muttered the words into Jo’s hair. “Not even if God himself comes down to smite me.”

+

After assuring Meredith she was okay and checking in with Bailey one more time, Jo and Harper were ready to leave Grey Sloan for the day, Alex right beside them. As Jo buckled Harper into her car seat, Alex could see that the hectic morning had worn her down. He quickly swiped her keys and jumped in the driver's seat, Jo slumping into the passenger's seat a minute later, eyelids heavy as she propped her head in her hand. 

“Don’t fall asleep yet, you gotta get me to your place,” Alex rested a hand on Jo’s thigh, looking her over with a smile. “I haven’t been here in two years and I’ve got no clue where you live.”

“The loft,” Jo was smiling, but it didn’t come up to her eyes. “I… we still live in the loft.”

Alex nodded quietly, knowing that Jo wanted to say more but couldn’t at the moment. He set off on the familiar path from Grey Sloan to the home he once shared with Jo. 

Both Jo and Harper fell asleep on the ride back, probably from the stress and emotion of the day. Parking in front of the loft, Alex walked around the car and lifted Harper out of her car seat and took her upstairs, unlocking the loft door and looking around the still familiar home.

Jo had set up an area on the far side of the loft with a crib and dresser for Harper, pink and purple curtains draped across the little corner to shield her off from the rest of the room. There was a basket of toys on the floor next to the couch and a highchair at the dining table, safety locks on the cabinets and a baby fence around the TV stand. All small signs that Jo had drastically changed her life to conform to the little girl in Alex’s arms. 

“She has pajamas in the top drawer of her dresser,” Alex turned around, staring at Jo who now stood behind him. Her eyes were bloodshot and she looked like she’d been dragged through the mud. 

“I've got her, why don’t you take a shower,” Alex nodded his head toward the bathroom as Jo eyed him warily. “I’m a peds doctor, I know what I’m doing Jo.”

Jo yawned and nodded at him, her feet moving slowly towards the bathroom. Alex carried Harper over to her corner and pulled out a pair of pajamas. He glanced up at the photo on the wall and grinned brightly. 

It was of him and Jo on their wedding day, both smiling widely with a joy he can still remember feeling. The picture had been on his work desk, he had looked at it every morning before he started his day and now so did his daughter. Jo’s neat block printing was painted on the bottom of the frame, brandishing three simple words. 

_ Mommy and Daddy.  _

Alex isn’t entirely sure how he changed and dressed Harper without completely losing it., but he rocked the little girl,  _ his daughter _ , back to sleep and set her in her crib gently. He turned the sound machine in the corner on and closed the curtains around Harper’s crib. 

When he’s done, Jo is walking out of the bathroom dressed in pajamas and looking a little better than she had before. She moved silently, straight towards Alex and into his embrace. Her arms squeezed him tightly as she buried her head into his neck, his own arms coming up to pull her closer to him. 

“You wanna know why I’m not mad at you,” Jo’s words are soft, but Alex is hanging on her every word. “You gave me the best gift I could’ve asked for. Harper is my life and I knew deep down that if you felt even a fraction of the love I feel for her for those kids, I could understand why you left. 

“I should’ve called you and told you, no matter what happened with us I should’ve told you about Harper. I tell her about you all the time, clearly she knows what you look like,” Jo laughed softly and looked up at Alex, her hand coming up to rest on his cheek, covering the angry red mark from earlier in the day with her palm. “I was upset at first, that you had left, even though a part of me understood why you did it. I spent a lot of time being angry at you, but when I looked into her eyes for the first time, I knew I could never stay mad at you after what you had given me. We obviously have a lot to talk about and work out, but I want you in Harper’s life.”

“And yours?”

“And mine,” Jo grinned, standing on her toes to brush her lips against Alex’s. “But I really wanna sleep more than anything else.” 

“You realize it's only noon right?”

“And you saw the day I had,” Jo raised her eyebrows at Alex, a small grin playing on to her face. “There was a shooter in the hospital, my daughter was all alone while we were on lockdown, I was trapped in an elevator, and the love of my life and father of my child dropped back into my life unexpectedly. All before noon. That’s a long day in my book.”

“Oh so I’m the love of your life now,” Alex laughed as he wrapped his arms around Jo, lifting her up and walking her over to her bed. “Well I’ll give you some good news. You’ll never have to worry about me popping up unexpectedly ever again because I'm not leaving ever again. I swear.”

Jo stared at Alex, her smile dropping into a frown. One of the last things he had said before he left her was just that, that he was never going to leave. In fact, he had said that to her so many times over the course of their time togethe, it had been a cornerstone of their relationship . The angry part of Jo’s heart screamed at her, saying that she should be mad and screaming at him and to push Alex away and she’s not quite sure that she can keep pushing that feeling down. 

“Well we’ve all heard that line before,” Jo huffed as she settled in under the covers, looking up at Alex. “I can’t… I want you here Alex but I can’t get hurt again. Last time I had nine months to get over you leaving before I had to worry about someone else more than myself. But this time if you leave me, if you leave us… Harper is two. When Ellis started preschool and left daycare, she cried for a week because she only saw her on the weekends. Neither of us can take you leaving again. She can’t and I…”

Jo let her head drop to the pillows below her, a sigh escaping her as she blinked back tears. She’d had enough crying for the day, had felt more emotions before noon than she had in what felt like years. She is not a beggar, had never begged for anyone to stay or to love her or to protect her. But Alex is different and Jo couldn’t stop the words as they slipped out of her mouth. 

“Please don’t hurt me again. I don’t need you to promise me anything, I just… I need you here for the long haul,” Jo forced a smile onto her face, then pulled the covers back and patted the spot next to her. “Now come over here, this bed gets cold in the winter.” 

Alex took his shoes off, shed his jacket and pants and crawled into bed beside Jo, who sidled up to him and cuddled into his side instantly. His arms pulled her closer and his lips pressed against her temple lightly. 

“You belong here, right here with me,” Jo’s words were a whisper as her eyelids fluttered closed. “Alex?”

“Hmm?”

“You get to wake up with her, you missed the four months of colic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> catch more of my writing on tumblr: doc-pickles


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to apologize in advance for this chapter...   
> (also this week and next are very heavy weeks for me at work so I might not be updating as frequently! please check out my tumblr page ,doc-pickles, for some INFJTT one shots!!)

_ Alex stared down at the test results that had just come up with shock and anger. Neither he or Izzie were carriers for Neurofibromatosis, which only meant one thing.  _

_ He wasn’t a father to the kids he’d been raising.  _

_ Alex crumpled the papers in his hand as he began stalking through the halls of Shawnee Memorial, on a war path towards Izzie. He knew he should’ve asked for a paternity test, should’ve asked more questions.  _

_ For a moment, his mind flicks to Jo and the future they could’ve had if he didn’t act so impulsively. No… he couldn’t do that to himself right now.  _

_ Alex finally found Izzie at a nurses station, immediately dragging her into the closest empty room he could find despite her protests.  _

_ “Alex what the hell! I’m working,” Izzie yanked her arm away from Alex grip and fixed him with an angry glare. “What do you want?” _

_ Alex was used to this cold shoulder act from Izzie. They had tried to make a go of things, but that only lasted about two months and ended abruptly when Alex began to call for Jo in his sleep.  _

_ “Were you ever gonna tell me Izzie? Or were you going to string me along for the rest of my goddamn life and make me believe those kids are mine,” Alex took in Izzie’s shock as he slammed down the papers in his hand. “The DNA testing came back. Neither of us are carriers which is literally impossible since your son obviously has Neurofibromatosis. So anything you wanna share with me?” _

_ Izzie stared at Alex, her eyes wide with unshed tears. There was a lot she probably had to say, but she wasn’t talking and Alex wasn’t in the mood to listen. He began stripping off his white coat, his stethoscope, his pager, and his name badge all at once.  _

_ “What’re you doing?” _

_ “I’m leaving, I quit so you can tell the Chief that,” Alex slammed his clipboard down onto the table and turned back to Izzie. “I’m going home to Seattle, where I should’ve stayed this whole damn time.” _

_ “Alex, please no, it was at a bar and I was drunk,” Izzie reached her hand out to grab his arm, but Alex shook her off and stalked away. “It was one mistake, we need you! The kids and I need you! I love you, don’t go, please!” _

_ “Fuck off Izzie, I’m done with this shit,” Alex called down the hallway as he set out to go home and pack and get out of Kansas as fast as he could.  _

The next week and half consists of the Karev’s settling into a new normal. Alex is welcomed back easily at Grey Sloan and Harper is riding high on the fact that “mommy AND daddy” are home most days. The father-daughter duo get along so well, sometimes it’s hard to tell that they were apart for so long. 

Jo, for all that’s gone right for her lately, still can’t help but worry that her world will come crashing down again. More than once, she’s bolted upright in the middle of the night, frightened by nightmares of Alex and Harper leaving her. A quick look to her left and across the room always confirm that both are still there, but the nagging fear always grips her chest and keeps her awake. 

The anxiety she feels during the day is harder to quell. The wave of worry that comes over her when Alex and Harper go home while she works, the doubt that makes her run downstairs between patients to make sure Harper is still in daycare, the misgiving feeling that finds her on the pediatric floor more often than she’d like to admit. While she’s grateful for the changes to her life, Jo can’t help the worries that constantly make themselves known.

“Jo? Joooooooo?”

Jo snapped her head up, eyes meeting Link’s with a look of pure exhaustion. She perked up when she saw the paper cup he extended to her, taking it with renewed vigor. 

“Oh you’re a god, thank you,” Jo sipped her coffee and sighed contentedly. “Perfect, you always know my order.” 

“I’m telling your husband you called me a God,” Link chuckled, swigging his own coffee. “You look like shit by the way.”

Jo rolled her eyes, walking with Link down the wide hallway. Being Jo’s oldest friend offered Link the opportunity to call her out, something that she despised greatly. The duo turned down an empty hallway, relief coursing through Jo as they stepped away from the cesspool of gossip that ran rampant through the halls of Grey Sloan. 

“First of all, Alex and I are not married,” Jo clarified. “And secondly, thanks asshole! You don’t tell a woman that!”

“Not married but you have a kid together and you live together and you’re sleeping together,” Link hummed in thought, his eyes shining mischievously as he looked at Jo with a quirked brow. “Okay, whatever you say Doctor  _ Karev _ .” 

“Woah woah woah,” Jo stopped Link from walking any further by stepping in front of him, one hand pressed to his chest. “We do have a kid together, one he just met a week ago, let me remind you. And we live together so he can see Harper more, but we are  _ not _ sleeping together. Well… we’re in the same bed but there’s nothing happening there, ya know, sexually.”

“So what’s this I hear from Amelia about you and Alex ‘defiling the elevator’ on his first day back,” Jo’s shocked face is enough to send Link into a bout of laughter. He collected himself fairly quickly, one hand coming to rest on Jo’s shoulder. “In all seriousness, you do look like shit. Are you okay?”

Jo groaned, her eyes skillfully avoiding Link’s. She knew eventually someone would ask her about her behavior, she had carefully planned out the conversation she would carry out to avoid talking about her feelings. The one thing she hadn’t counted on was Link. This was the man who had held her while she had cried over Alex’s sudden departure, who had held her hand at her first ultrasound, who was her daughter’s godfather. Jo knew that she couldn’t hide what was happening in her head from Link, but she couldn’t find the words to explain the fear that gripped her heart every moment she wasn’t beside Alex and Harper. 

“I… I’m scared,” Jo whispered, eyes trained to her hand that still rested on Link’s chest. “I have something so good in my life and I am terrified every moment I’m awake that it’s going to vanish right before my eyes. I lost Alex already and I can’t lose him again, it will literally kill me. And Harper… I can’t…” 

Whatever Jo was going to say next is lost in the sounds of her tears, loud wracking sobs that shook her body. Link brought his arms up and held Jo tightly, her arms falling to her sides as she continued to cry. When her sobs softened, Link spoke quietly to Jo.

“You’re living with your heart outside of your chest, for someone who’s had a life like yours that’s a new feeling,” Link’s voice was smooth and calming as Jo regained control of her breathing. “You’re worried about your family and you don’t want things to change, it’s normal. I’m assuming you haven’t talked to Alex about this.”

Jo shook her head, keeping her face pressed against Link still. She was grateful for her friend, but she wasn’t ready to face her problems yet.

“Well maybe you should, I’m sure he’s feeling just as confused as you,” Link pulled back, looking down at Jo with a smile. “I do know one thing though. For all he’s done in the past, I can’t see Alex leaving you or Harper anytime soon.”

+   
“You look like you’ve got lots going on in that big brain of yours,” Meredith teased as she came to stand next to Alex. “What’re you thinking about?”

“Izzie.”

Meredith looked from Alex to the ground beneath her feet. It was dark out, dark enough that she knew he should be at home already. Instead, he was standing out front of Grey Sloan, eyes watching the building with an intensity that Meredith had seen before but could never really understand. She did understand, though, why he chose to stand here and think about his ex. 

“We never got back together, not really. I… I was too wrapped up in Jo still. And part of me wonders why that wasn’t enough of a driving force for me to ask questions or to come back here just once. My whole life would be different, Mer,” Alex finally tore his eyes away from the hospital, looking to his best friend. “I could’ve known my daughter, could’ve been there when she came into the world. I could have been there for Jo while she was pregnant and then I would be the one complaining about four months without sleep because Harper had colic. I fucked up.”

Meredith let out a sigh, her hands burrowing into her jacket pockets as she stared ahead. Moments like these made her miss Derek deeply. He was always more of a people person than her, he would know exactly what to say and what would make Alex feel like things were going to be okay. But then, she thought, it wouldn’t matter. Because Alex wouldn’t go to Derek, he would always go to her. And sometimes Meredith’s crappy advice was better than anyone else’s to her best friend.

“After the plane crash, before Lexie… ,” Meredith paused, her eyes meeting Alex’s for a brief second before returning to the hospital.  _ Grey Sloan Memorial.  _ “Before Lexie died, Mark laid next to her and told her he loved her and that they were meant to be. They talked about this great big future they were going to have together and then… Lexie and Mark didn’t get a second chance, they didn’t get a do over to be with the person they loved. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, after all these years I don’t know why. But you and Jo… you get your second chance to be together. And things would be different if you had stayed, you’re right, but you can’t change that. You can only be grateful for the present and the opportunities you two have now.”

“Wow, when’d you go soft,” Alex joked, bringing his arm up to pull Meredith into his embrace. “Thanks for that. I think I needed someone to kick me in the ass and tell me I was being dumb.”

“You know I’m always here for a reality check,” Meredith grinned. She looked up and saw Jo and Harper walking towards them, the younger asleep on her mom's shoulder. “And besides, you wouldn’t have wanted to deal with pregnant Jo, she was mean and grumpy.”   
Jo, who had approached the duo just in time to hear Meredith’s quip about her, let her jaw fall open as she looked at Meredith in shock. 

“Hey! I was not that bad,” Jo looked from Meredith to Alex, a blush forming on her cheeks. “Okay… I might have been that bad. I blame the hormones.”   
Alex squeezed Meredith’s shoulders once more before reaching and gently grabbing Harper from Jo’s arms. He waved goodbye to his friend and slung his free arm around Jo’s shoulders, the trio walking towards the parking lot. Meredith didn’t think that Izzie would ever leave Alex’s mind, but his replacement was far better than anything she could’ve thought up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> find more of my writing on my tumblr: doc-pickles


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey hey hey friends! it took me way too long to write this chapter and it's only a filler. i promise that the next chapter will be full of all sorts of fun stuff, but for now enjoy this small offering of jolex family fluff. i'm hoping that between work and life i can post at least one chapter this week, but we'll see what happens!  
> as always THANK YOU for your kudos, comments, and messages. these are what gets me thorugh my writing slimps! enjoy!

_ The loft was dark, only one solitary light shining from the kitchen as Link let himself into the apartment. He set his keys and the groceries he had bought on the dining table, his feet moving quietly through the large room in search of Jo. When his eyes finally found her, his heart sank with a deep sigh. _

_ Jo was curled up in the king size bed, one hand curled around a ratty grey sweatshirt and the other holding her burgeoning stomach. She had been crying, if the dimmed lights and lack of noise weren't enough of an indicator, the tear tracks and damp pillow below her were.  _

_ “Josie,” Link plopped himself on the edge of the bed next to Jo, one hand coming up to run through her brunette locks. “What’s wrong? Besides the obvious.” _ _  
_ _ “They kicked,” the words were barely loud enough for Link to hear, but he knew exactly what was running through Jo’s mind. “They kicked me today and you know who reached over to feel it? Jackson, because he was eating lunch with me. Jackson felt my baby’s first kick.” _ _  
_ _ As the words spilled out of her mouth, tears began pouring from Jo’s eyes again. Link kicked his shoes off quickly, climbing behind Jo on the bed and bringing her into his embrace. Her hands gripped tightly at his shirt, sobs escaping as she buried her face in his chest. _

_ “Why wasn't I enough? What did I do,” Jo cried out, her voice breaking as she asked Link a question he didn’t have an answer to. “Why didn't he love me enough to stay? I need him, I can’t do this without him, Link. I need Alex back. I can’t raise this baby without him.” _

+

“So I heard you put Karev on a celibacy vow following your steamy elevator rendezvous.”

Jo looked up from her phone, choking momentarily on her coffee. She gawked at Amelia Shepherd, who was now sitting beside her in the cafeteria. A bright blush spread across Jo’s cheeks as she brought one hand up to try and cover it. Leave it to her big mouthed best friend to tell his wife her dirty secrets. 

“Jeez, Link really doesn’t keep his mouth shut,” Jo groaned, a smile sneaking up on her face. “Yes, I told Alex we can’t have sex again until we… settle into things? I just don’t want that to complicate things. And they’re already pretty complicated as is.”

“Better you than me, I couldn’t imagine doing that,” Amelia settled one hand onto her growing stomach, a laugh escaping her as she looked back to Jo. “I’m working with twice the hormones though, so I think it’s a bit different.”

Amelia and Jo had grown close the past three years, Jo spending a large amount of her pregnancy hanging around Link, Amelia, and Scout as she mourned the end of her marriage and tried to wrap her mind around bringing a child into the world. The older woman had been a great source of comfort for Jo, always knowing exactly what would get through her hormone ridden mind when Link fumbled his words.

“You’re lucky I like you, I wouldn’t tolerate this line of questioning from anyone else you know,” Jo snagged one of Amelia’s garlic fries, turning back to her phone. “Have you and Link come to an agreement on baby names yet?”   
“No and I’m ready to kill him,” Amelia groaned, smacking Jo’s hand away from her fries. “You don’t even like garlic fries, keep your sticky fingers away from mine.”   
“Hey you can always do what I did and drive your husband away to his ex wife so you can name your baby by yourself,” Jo grinned at the shocked expression on Amelia’s face. “Oh you should see your face! Priceless!”

Both women began to laugh then, a few heads around the room turning to stare at them in confusion. Amelia tried in vain to cover her laughter, which in turn only made Jo laugh harder. 

“You’re horrible,” Amelia choked out, taking a sip of her water as she lovingly shoved Jo’s shoulder. “In all seriousness, I think Link and I are both coming around on Parker.”

“Awww that’s adorable! See, I knew you guys would agree on something eventually,” Jo’s pager beeped then, prompting her to stand with a groan. “I’ve got a 911, we’ll talk later. Keep my godson safe in there!”

Jo hurried down to the ER, eyes scanning the room looking for Owen. When she finally spotted him she jogged over, entering the room that he and three nurses occupied. 

“Hunt! You paged?”   
Jo’s eyes flitted down to the little boy on the table in front of Owen. He couldn’t have been more than ten years old, his body bruised and bleeding as he lay unconscious before Jo. His curly black hair was matted with blood, making him look years younger and even more vulnerable than he already was.

“Ethan Walker, 9 years old. He was walking home from West Seattle Middle when he was jumped by three guys. He’s beat up pretty badly,” Owen relayed the info to Jo as he continued to check out the boy. “I paged neuro and peds too, you’re the first one here. Looking like a possible spleen puncture.”   
Jo lifted the boy’s shirt, heart dropping as she saw the state to his chest. She wouldn’t be able to get a good idea of how extensive the damage was until they got him open, which seemed the only option at this point. Her heart sank, imagining how worried she would be if it was Harper on the table. Now that she was a mother herself, pediatric cases gripped Jo’s heart more than usual.    
“We need to take him into surgery, I just want to wait for Peds to confirm what I’m seeing here before we go up,” Jo relayed to Owen, one hand coming down to push some stray curls out of the little boy's face. “Poor baby, he didn’t deserve this.”

“Hey what’ve we got,” Alex walked into the room, a deep sigh leaving him as he looked at the state of their patient. “Jesus… Jo, what’re you thinking?”   
“That we need to move out because he was jumped in our neighborhood,” Jo looked up at Alex, a grim expression on her face. “We also need to get him up to the OR as soon as possible. There’s definitely a spleen puncture and I’m thinking that his lungs were nicked too, his O2 levels aren’t looking great. I won’t know more until we open him up.”

Alex nodded, one hand coming to grip the side of the gurney while the other found the low of Jo’s back. He could feel the tension radiating off of her, she was always upset when kids came in now. Unfortunately that meant that cases they worked together were not happy occasions, something Alex tried to combat by comforting Jo as much as possible. 

“Okay let’s move team,” Owen called out, him and Alex pushing the gurney out into the hallway with Jo trailing behind them. “Jo, I think his parents are here, can you fill them in and meet us in OR 2?”

Alex looked up to the trauma bay where he saw two distraught looking women, both staring helplessly at their patient. Jo nodded quietly, rushing past Owen and Alex to speak with the women. Alex’s heart ached for her, knowing that talking to parents was not something Jo loved. But he pressed on, following Owen towards the elevator and only turning around once when he heard one of the women sobbing loudly.

Today was going to be a long day. 

+

“Hey can you put toaster strudels down on the grocery list?” 

Alex looked up from his place on the floor, staring at Jo with a confused expression. She was seated on the couch, head buried in a magazine about experimental surgeries. He was shocked that she was acting so normal given the events of the day before. 

Yesterday had been brutal for him and Jo, the little boy who had been jumped coding twice in surgery and now laying in a medically induced coma in the PICU. Jo had sobbed into Alex’s arms last night, heart broken that they had to inform his parents that their son might not wake up. 

“You don’t like toaster strudels,” Alex pointed out as he took the wooden block that Harper handed him. “You said cooked fruit freaks you out.”

“They’re for Harper, obviously,” Jo scoffed at Alex, but he gave her a knowing stare which prompted her to roll her eyes. “Fine, they’re for me. Shut up.” 

Alex had learned a lot since returning to Seattle. He had discovered that Harper loved asparagus but hated applesauce, that she stayed with Link and Amelia every other Thursday, and that she couldn’t sleep without her green stuffed monkey Chester. He had also learned that Jo’s tastes had changed drastically, something she blamed on her outrageous pregnancy cravings permanently changing her taste buds. She now enjoyed jalapeños, sauerkraut, and toaster strudels, things she had never taken an interest in before. 

“Wait, didn’t you say you were going on a diet,” Alex watched as Harper began to build her block tower on his stomach, her small hands constantly coming to press down his rising and falling chest. “Harps, I can’t stop breathing, it would upset your mother.” 

“I can start that next week, we need to buy strawberry toaster strudels when we go shopping tomorrow,” Jo grabbed the highlighter tucked behind her ear and circled something on the page in front of her. “I’m thinking chicken alfredo for dinner. Thoughts?”

Both Alex and Harper turned to look at Jo, noses scrunched up in the same fashion. Jo had to hold back a laugh because the two looked absolutely identical. One thing she had loved about having Alex back was that she was able to see the similarities between him and their daughter up close. Before, if Harper would do anything even close to Alex’s mannerisms it would send Jo’s mind into a dark spot. But things were different now, a good different, but nothing like the life Jo had grown used to. 

“Babe, I love you, but your taste buds should not be controlling our dinner choices,” Alex turned to Harper, a grin on his face as he began to tickle her. “Was she starving you the whole time? Force feeding you sauerkraut and chicken alfredo?”   
_ Babe, I love you. _

He hadn’t said it since they had reunited, but the way Alex had slipped the confession so casually into their conversation made Jo’s heart skip a beat.  _ He loved her. _ Of course she loved him too, as crazy as it made her feel she didn’t think that she had ever stopped loving him. But hearing him say it out loud confirmed everything she had hoped for the past few weeks.

Jo couldn’t help herself as she set her magazine down and crawled across the carpet to lean over Alex, a grin lighting her face up like the Fourth of July. Harper had grown tired of her father and was now distracted with a coloring book she had found in her toy box,

“You look like a psycho murderer,” Alex chuckled, one hand coming up to caress Jo’s cheek. “Why’re you grinning at me like that? Were you waiting until you lulled me into a false sense of security to murder me?”   
“I love you too,” Jo whispered, her lips coming down to meet Alex’s. When she pulled back, Alex was staring up at her with a look of adoration. “You said you love me, I love you too.”

“Let’s buy a house,” Alex whispered, his eyes scanning Jo’s face. “Let’s move out of this shitty neighborhood and buy a house with a backyard and a big kitchen.”

“And a few extra bedrooms,” Jo suggested, eyes meeting Alex’s with a sly grin. “You know, just in case?”

“Just in case? You wanna tell me something, Jo,” Alex laughed as he pulled Jo towards him, quickly flipping their positions so she lay sprawled out on the living room rug. “You hiding another baby from me somewhere around here?”   
A squeal of laughter left Jo, her eyes squeezing shut as Alex let his fingers come up to her sides to tickle her. She was happy, truly happy for the first time in… well a very long time. Her hands came up to grab Alex’s face, eyes meeting his with a sincere look in them.

“You’re staying, right? Not going anywhere again?”

“Of course I am, I love you and I’ve already missed out on too much,” Alex grinned, his crooked smile lighting up his face. “I want a great big future with you and Harper and however many more babies you wanna give me.”   
“Easy for you to say, you didn’t have to go through 31 hours of labor,” Jo rolled her eyes, bringing Alex in for another kiss. “Next time I get to yell at you instead of Meredith. I’m still not sure she’s forgiven me for the names I called her.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Check out more of my writing on Tumblr: doc-pickles


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends! Soooo two things: One, as always THANK YOU for the sweet comments and the reviews, they've been super awesome to read. Secondly.... This chapter is probably the longest in this story so far and you'll see why. I really hope y'all like where I'm taking this story because it was supposed to be over like three chapters ago LOL  
> ANYWAYS ENJOY AND THANK YOU FOR READING!!!!
> 
> (PS this chapter is SUPER important and special to me because i really tried to highlight Jo's struggle with anxiety and make her thoughts and actions seem as real as possible. Anxiety is also something I struggle with a lot so I hope I did it justice :)

_ There was an alarm blaring somewhere, loud and annoying and drilling into Alex’s sleep deprived mind. It took him a minute to realize that the alarm was his phone, alerting him to the fact that he needed to get up and round on his patients. He had slept in an on call room, preferring the silence it offered to Izzie yelling at him once again for something he had no control over. He reached for his phone, shutting the alarm off and staring at the screen for a moment. _

_ June 9. _

_ A groan left Alex as he fell back onto the bed, eyes shutting as he attempted to stop his mind from reeling. But he couldn’t, not really. Because no matter how hard he tried, she never left his mind. It had been seven long months without Jo and Alex still couldn’t stop his mind from drifting to his wife. Ex wife. _

_ He reached for his wallet that he had tucked into his lab coat, fingers brushing the worn leather as he opened it up. Alex reached behind his credit cards and drivers license to the worn piece of paper he found himself looking at so often.  _

_ She was smiling, that genuine no bullshit smile that he loved to see so much. And her dress, he feels as if he’s memorized the places it clings so easily to her. If he concentrates hard enough, he can almost feel her hands pressing into his shoulders as they shared their first kiss as husband and wife. _

_ How in the hell did they go from that to where they are now in just two short years? _

+

“I have to go back to Kansas.”

The coffee cup in Jo’s hand slips, falling ungracefully into the kitchen sink and shattering as the ceramic meets the metal with a loud thud. 

“Jesus Christ, Jo! What the hell,” Alex exclaimed as he moved to clean the mess of the shattered cup. “If you would’ve let me finish, I could’ve told you that it’s not for long and I’m coming right back home.”

Jo can feel her breathing return to normal again, her eyes looking from the sink up to Alex. He stopped what he was doing, hands settling onto Jo’s shoulders as he fixed her with an affectionate stare. 

“I have to go back and sort out a bunch of legal things. My name is still on my apartment, my car is out there, and,” Alex sighs, eyes flashing with anger momentarily. “And I’m still on all the paperwork for Izzie’s kids. Plus I kinda just… walked outta my job.”

“I know, I get it, it just makes me nauseous thinking about it,” Jo wasn’t lying, her stomach was violently churning at the thought of Alex leaving her and Harper. So much so that she had to push down the urge to vomit with a heavy gulp. “But, I get that you have to go. As long as you come back home to us then I have zero complaints.”

Leaning down to kiss Jo, Alex realized how incredibly lucky he was to have someone who was so understanding. A part of him ached at that realization, knowing that she would have understood him wanting to go to Kansas three years ago if he had explained the situation to her. 

“I’m heading out tomorrow morning and I’ll call you everyday,” Alex pulled Jo into him, one hand rubbing back slowly. “I swear Jo, I’m not leaving you two again. Now you want a parting gift or what?”

Alex raised his eyebrows, his free hand coming down to grab Jo’s ass with a chuckle. Jo leaned into him easily, lips coming up to ghost across his neck momentarily. Harper was at a sleepover with Meredith’s kids, something that her parents were eternally grateful for. 

“Mmm I do think we’ve settled into things now,” a devilish grin appeared on Jo’s face as she pulled back from Alex and tugged on the collar of his shirt. “This is our first night alone in the whole two months since you’ve been home. I think that’s a good excuse to celebrate.”

Alex swooped down, lips capturing Jo’s as her hands began to explore his chest, pulling at his shirt desperately. They had both stayed true to Jo’s request and hadn’t had sex since their elevator tryst, but the mounting sexual tension between them had grown increasingly hard to ignore the past week. Jo broke apart from Alex, hands ridding him of his shirt as she pushed him gently towards their bed.

“Oh you have no idea how hard I’m gonna celebrate this,” Alex grinned as Jo sat herself on top of him, hands roaming up his bare chest. “I forgot how much I missed this.”

+

Jo woke up the next morning to a quiet loft. Harper wasn’t home yet and Alex had left a note and a cup of coffee out for Jo before he left for the airport. She snuggled further down in the blankets of their bed, hands reaching out for Alex’s pillow. She missed him already, her anxieties already taking over her mind as she tried to close her eyes and focus on something else. 

_ Harper… Harper and Alex… Alex and Izzie’s kids… Alex and Izzie… Alex… Alex… Alex…  _

Jo couldn’t help it, her anxiety overwhelmed her body and she raced to the bathroom, overcome with the urge to vomit. Head leaning against the cool porcelain, Jo let last night’s dinner come up easily. 

“Oh god,” Jo groaned, picking her head up from the toilet bowl as she heard an incessant knocking at the loft door. “It’s open!”

Excited giggles and talking could be heard in the living room now, alerting Jo to the fact that Meredith had brought Harper back from her sleepover. Jo threw her head back towards the toilet bowl, groaning as she continued to vomit. A quiet knock sounded on the bathroom door, Meredith’s head peeking in a moment later.

“Wow you look like crap.”   
“Thank you, just what I wanted to hear,” Jo sighed, flushing the toilet and standing to brush her teeth. “I’m just a little anxious about Alex being in Kansas, that’s all.”   
Meredith nodded, watching silently as Jo rinsed her mouth out. She had known her friend long enough to realize that something else was going on, something that maybe even Jo didn’t see.

“Hey when you and Alex… you know defiled that elevator, did you use protection,” Meredith mused, watching carefully as Jo paused, then kept moving as if Meredith’s words didn’t affect her. “You dirty whore!”   
“Meredith! Jeez my kid is out there,” Jo turned to Meredith, hands resting on her hips as she rolled her eyes. “I am absolutely not pregnant if that’s what you’re implying. I think I would know if I was.”

Meredith let her line of questioning fall silent, but Jo’s mind kept reeling. Her and Alex hadn’t used protection when they had hooked up in the elevator… twice… Nevertheless, Jo was confident that she wasn’t pregnant. Her slight weight gain and her anxious vomiting were just normal everyday things she’d deal with at a different time. 

+

( _ Alex is italics _ , Jo is normal)

_ “Hey babe. How’ve my girls been?” _

“Stress eating, mostly. And I’ve been stress vomiting too so that’s fun. The tiny human is perfectly fine though, besides standing by the door and yelling ‘Daddy’ at the top of her lungs. Can you tell we’re totally fine with you being gone?”

_ “Maybe you should take a break, babe. Take the day off and recharge. I don’t want you going crazy.” _

“I’m fine, I just wanna make a grilled cheese and then take a three hour nap. Seriously don’t worry about me, you have enough crazy to deal with there.” 

_ “You’re telling me, Izzie is livid that I’m trying to take my name off of the kids' papers. You know, the kids that aren’t mine. My lawyer is not taking any of her shit though, he’s been a godsend. Should have all this wrapped up by Friday afternoon and I’ll be home with you bright and early Saturday morning.”  _

“Good because I miss you. A lot. More than I probably should for only having you back for two months.”

_ “I am pretty missable. I was just checking in between meetings, I’ll call you tomorrow okay?” _

“And I’m heading into the ER for what should be a fun day. Stay safe out there in the wild west. I love you.”

_ “I love you too. Give Harps kisses from me.”  _

Jo hung up with a sigh, storing her phone in her locker and moving towards the ER where she was working for the day. The distraction that the chaotic area of the hospital provided was much needed after the stress she had been under the past few days. Running to the trauma bay, Jo was immediately greeted by Owen and an awaiting ambulance. 

“32 year old passenger from a multi car MVC pileup. She’s got deep lacerations on her chest from the seat belt, hypotensive in the field but stable by the time we brought her in. She’s also 28 weeks pregnant.”

“Karev, assess her injuries but don’t do anything until we get OB down here,” Owen directed Jo, who nodded and began to work on the woman in front of her. “Stabilize her, I’m going to check on the other victims.”

“I’m Doctor Karev, I’m gonna take care of you today,” Jo stared down at the woman in front of her, the woman's blue eyes staring up at her in fear. She brushed her hand through the woman’s auburn hair, hoping to comfort her just a little. “Can you tell me your name?”

“Kacey James,” her voice was hoarse, but Kacey was doing her best to communicate with Jo. “Is my son okay? Is Landon okay?”

The woman’s voice was frantic as she looked at Jo, her eyes full of unshed tears that made Jo tear up herself. For an expecting mother, the most terrifying thought was their baby not being okay while sitting inside of them. To think about the fact that their baby might die while they are their responsibility and theirs alone… well Jo had her fair number of moments when she had worried about Harper before she was born. 

“I’m waiting for our OB to come down and tell us for sure but,” Jo pulled her stethoscope from around her neck to listen carefully for a fetal heartbeat. “I can hear a steady heartbeat. It’s not a guarantee, but it’s a good sign.”

A sigh left Kacey, her uninjured hand coming up to cradle her bump. Jo watched the woman in front of her with a pang of tenderness, understanding exactly how this stranger felt. She thought, for a moment, that any mother could understand what Kacey was feeling.

A stray hand fell to Jo’s stomach, her fingers brushing across her scrub top. Maybe Meredith had some strong points, maybe the reason that Jo felt so strongly for Kacey’s situation was because she too was carrying a child within her. She quickly brushed the feeling away, knowing that if she really was pregnant some higher power within her would know and tell her. 

“Kacey, I’m going to make sure that you and Landon are perfectly okay,” Jo moved her hand back up to Kacey’s hair, stroking it with a smile as she leaned down to speak with her patient. “You’re going to be just fine.”

+

After setting her daughter down in her crib, Jo collapsed on her bed. Yesterday had been long and hard and without Alex by her side she felt helpless to her circumstances. Kacey had made it through the long surgery Jo and Carina had tag teamed to take care of a perfed bowel and some minor lacerations, comforting Jo minorly. Jackson would have to go back in to repair some of the deeper wounds, but they wanted to let Kacey and Landon rest before they put her under again. 

As her thoughts began to overwhelm her, Jo’s phone chose that moment to ring, Jo getting up and slipping out onto the balcony as she answered Alex’s phone call with a small smile.

“Hey there stranger. How’s Kansas?”   
_ “Dry and boring and lonely. You two doing any better?” _

“We’re hanging in. Harper painted a very nice picture yesterday entirely with green paint. Mom on the other hand had a car crash victim who was almost 30 weeks pregnant. That was rough.”

_ “Are they okay? Mom and baby made it out right?” _

“Yeah they’re fine it was just a lot. I have tomorrow off though so we’re going to try and do something fun.”

_ “Why don’t you go down to Pike’s Place and have lunch at that place you like. You and Harps can go shopping after. You know, a girls day or whatever they call it.” _

“You’re making some very good points. Everything with the apartment go okay today?”

_ “Yeah, the landlord was very understanding and I was able to get rid of all the junk in the apartment pretty easily. I shipped a couple things back home, but the boxes are giant so don’t you dare try and move them yourself.” _

“I promise I won’t, I’m too tired to do anything anyways.”

_ “Yeah what's with that? You said you took a nap today. You never take naps.” _

“I’m fine, I just miss you. You’d think after being just Harper and I for so long that I would be used to not having you here. But I don’t think I ever really got used to it.”

_ “I’ll be home in two days and then you’ll get sick of me. Go on and get in bed, you sound exhausted and I can tell your mind is working harder than it should be. I love you.” _

“I love you too.”

+

“Did you find out yet?”

“Jesus Christ Link! You can’t sneak up on me like that.”

Jo turned on her heel, hand coming up to smack Link’s chest. He had been her first call after hanging up with Alex four days ago and he had been a pain in her ass ever since. 

“I’m asking sensible questions. Alex texted me today, he never does that! He’s worried! Your not-husband comes homes tomorrow morning and you still haven’t peed on a damn stick,” Link raised an eyebrow at Jo, holding his hands out as if to ask what her hold up was. “You two are finally happy, you’ve got a daughter and you’re literally looking at houses to buy. Why won’t you pee, Jo? What are you hiding?”

The reasons that Link laid out were  _ exactly  _ why Jo didn’t want to confirm what she had been thinking. They were the same reasons that she had waited almost two months to take a test when she was pregnant with Harper. She was scared out of her mind, worried that if she took a test now that Alex wouldn’t come home and she’d be in the same position she had been in three years ago. 

Deep down she knew, she knew without a doubt that any stick she peed on would turn blue and any blood test she took would show elevated hCG levels. And part of her wanted that, she wanted another baby with Alex so badly. 

But with him being gone for the week and her already growing anxiety, Jo’s heart didn’t have it in her to see the results of a pregnancy test. The anxious woman who spent nine months crying over the father of her baby being gone did not want to face a world where that could be a reality again. 

Because last time she had taken a pregnancy test, Jo had had to face the reality of her husband leaving her through a damn letter. 

Because when she had laid in her hospital bed, staring at her daughter, she was alone and she was scared.

Because for all she had gone through in her life, Jo didn’t think she could survive going through all of that alone again. 

“I have my reasons,  _ Atticus _ ,” Jo’s voice had a bite to it as she began to walk away from her friend. “Goodbye! Give Amelia my love! And thanks for taking my kid tonight, you’re the best!”

+

Two hours after her run in with Atticus, Jo found herself lounging across her couch, binging reality TV and eating popcorn. She was dead on her feet, body exhausted after the stressful week she had. She was thankful for the peace and quiet without Harper, but she desperately missed her and Alex. Jo was about to call Atticus just so she could bring Harper home and cuddle her when her phone rang. A smile lit up Jo’s face as she realized Alex was the one calling her. 

“Hello Doctor Karev.”

_ “Hello to you too Doctor Karev. How are you?” _

“I’m okay, just got home. Link and Amelia offered to take Harper for the night which I am super thankful for. I need a break, you were right. But I miss her and you, it’s too quiet here.”

_ “I’m always right. Hey, I got some bad news. My flights got all switched around so I won’t be home tomorrow morning after all.”  _

“Oh god, please don’t tell me you’re staying in Kansas, Alex.”

_ “Jesus Christ no, I’d sooner jump in front of a car.” _

“Good good. Okay now that I don’t think I’m going to puke, are you going to tell me when you’re coming back?”

“Right about now,” Jo turned towards the door of the loft, relief coursing through her body as she saw Alex standing in front of her. 

“Oh thank god,” Jo breathed out, launching herself up from the couch and into Alex’s arms. “You don’t know how happy I am to see you.”

Alex wrapped his arms around Jo easily, happy to see her given the rocky week they had both had. After having Izzie yell at him, his former boss give him an earful for the way he exited, and seeing the kids he had considered his own used as pawns in his escape from Kansas, he was more than happy to be back in Seattle.

“Probably about as happy as I am to see you,” Alex leaned back and kissed Jo soundly, one hand coming up to stroke her cheek. “You look like hell. I’m only saying it because I care. Which reminds me, I got you something.”   
Jo watched in confusion as Alex rooted around in his suitcase, finally pulling out a brown bag and handing it to Jo. She opened it curiously, heart beginning to pound again as she looked at what was inside. 

“I could tell just from your phone calls, it’s kinda my job,” Alex shrugged, hands slipping into his pockets. “Have you already taken a test?”   
Looking from Alex down to the bag of pregnancy tests, Jo felt tears welling up in her eyes. The emotions she had been holding back were finally overflowing as Jo shook her head, eyes meeting Alex’s finally.

“I was so scared,” Jo cried as she let her shoulders fall, feeling her anxiety over the situation melt away now that Alex was standing in front of her. “I’m sorry, I just… I was so nervous that things would play out like they did last time and I couldn’t put myself through that this time because I really want this.”

Alex moved forward, bringing Jo back into his embrace. He hated that he was the reason she was feeling this way, that he had made her feel so helpless when he left. More than that though he was relieved to hear that she wanted this just as much as he did because it meant that maybe he hadn’t entirely screwed things up. 

“I love you, Jo. I love you so much and I’ve fucked up and I know you told me not to make any promises this time but,” Alex sighed, eyes meeting Jo with sincerity. “I am not leaving you. I’m not leaving Harper. I’m not leaving Seattle ever again unless you’re by my side, I swear on my life. And if you are pregnant, then I’ll be right by your side for the whole damn thing. You’re not getting rid of me Josephine Karev.” 

Alex’s words stopped the frantic beating of Jo’s heart and let her relax into his arms, eyes closing as she held him as close as she could. He was right, Jo had told Alex not to make her any more promises because she didn’t want to get hurt again. But after the hell they had been through, after the hell she had walked alone, Jo’s rough heart had grown soft and the words he spoke now comforted her. 

“I’m pregnant, I don’t need to take a test to tell me that,” Jo looked up to Alex, a small grin on her face. “But I’ll take one to humor you, since you didn’t get to be here last time.”

Alex pressed a long, sweet kiss on Jo’s lips, one hand gently drifting down to palm her stomach. The tender act made Jo melt, another small reassurance that things were much different than they had been three years ago. A reminder that this time, things would be okay.


	8. Chapter Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends... So it's been over a month.... I bet you guys thought this story was done... Honestly for a moment I did too and I was super bummed because I love this story so much. But stepping away from my writing and focusing on myself did the trick and I am now happy to report that I have the WHOLE ENTIRE rest of Hesitate planned out and I'm slowly (very slowly) chipping away at writing to make those plans a reality.   
> Thanks to all of you for being so patient and for wanting me to continue this project!! You're the beeeeeest!!  
> xoxo Nina

_ “Jo… Jo come back to bed, baby. Alarm doesn’t go off for ten minutes.” _

_ Izzie stared down Alex’s still sleeping figure, watching him for a moment before continuing to walk around the room and get ready for the day. Every morning for the past week, Alex would always call out for Jo when Izzie got out of bed for work. She didn’t think he knew, but the words annoyed her more and more everyday. _

_ “Babe, come back,” Alex groaned, rolling on to his stomach and reaching out for the side of the bed that Izzie had just left. “Jo… Jo…” _

_ “I’m not Jo, Alex,” Izzie exclaimed in frustration, prompting Alex to fly up in bed and look from the empty side of the bed to Izzie. “I am not Jo! And I never will be and if that’s a problem for you, then you can run back to Seattle!” _

_ “Izzie no… I’m sorry I,” Alex ran a hand through his hair and let out a groan. “I wanna stay here for the kids but I… I don’t think you and I are going to work out this time.” _

_ “Why would it ever? You’re just the same pathetic man I left ten years ago,” Izzie threw a pillow towards Alex as she walked out of the bedroom. “I can’t believe you, Alex. Actually I can! You’re still not good enough for me.” _

  
  


_ Deep breaths. In, out, in, out. Good, you can do this. Today will be a breeze.  _

Jo had found out about her pregnancy a month ago and every day since then had consisted of her trying to keep her breakfast down. Some days were better than others, but today might be the worst. She’d had to break out her elastic banded scrubs this morning because her regular scrubs wouldn’t pull up over her hips. The elastic was much more comfortable, but the thought of her body changing again had sent Jo into a fit of tears on the bathroom floor which resulted in her throwing up for almost 20 minutes.

“Karev! I’ve got an abdominal obstruction and I think we’re gonna need an emergency colostomy surgery,” Owen sidled up to Jo as the two walked into the ER, the older man sending Jo a grin. “But that’s up to you of course. Good luck!” 

Jo grabbed the chart outside Trauma Room 2, entering the room with a forced smile. Her stomach had been flipping back and forth since she woke up this morning and she’d thrown up twice before she came into work. Apparently her baby was not happy to be residing in her uterus. 

“Hi Mr. Little, I'm Doctor Karev and I’m gonna check you out real quick and we’ll see where to go from there,” Jo tried to put on a happy face as her stomach churned unpleasantly. She grabbed her stethoscope and began her routine check. “You said you’ve been having stomach pain, how long has that been going on for?”

“About three days,” the older man let out a groan as Jo began to palpate his abdomen. “Oh that’s not a pleasant feeling. A little softer dear or…”

Jo looked up as her patient fell silent, watching in abject horror as the man leaned forward and vomited across his lap. Moving as quickly as she could, Jo leapt back but was greeted with blowback across her chest and arms. 

“Oh god,” Jo’s stomach flipped a final time before she turned to her left and emptied her stomach onto the floor of the ER. Jo felt as if the whole room was staring her down as she stood next to a pile of her own vomit. It was as if those dreams of going to school naked had come alive, a feeling of horror washing over Jo as she processed what had just happened.

“What the hell is happening,” Owen rushed over, looking from Jo to her patient, who was staring at her in shock. “Mr. Little, I’ll get you another doctor right away. And someone to help you clean up. Karev, follow me.” 

Turning to follow Owen, Jo paused as the scent of vomit overwhelmed her senses once again. Stepping around Owen, Jo leaned over the closest trash bin and emptied her stomach again, a strangled cry leaving her as the acid burned her throat. 

“You can go home,” Owen was standing behind Jo now, a gentle hand resting on her back as she stayed bent over. “We’ll survive without you. Go home, Jo.”

A heavy sigh left Jo as she nodded to Owen, standing up and heading upstairs for the attendings lounge. She hadn’t even been out of the house for an hour and she felt like the whole day was going down the drain. 

Pressing a hand against the growing swell of her stomach, Jo silently begged the little life resting there to just calm down for the rest of the day. Her almost 12 week bump was harder to camouflage, but Jo knew that the closer she came to her second trimester the less her morning sickness would be an issue. She let out a heavy sigh, head popping up as the empty elevator chimed, signaling that it had arrived at its destination and was kicking Jo off into reality. 

“I’m looking for Doctor Karev, it’s not a hard question to answer!”

Jo groaned as she turned a corner, not wanting to deal with anyone else today. Her job came first though, so she walked to the nurses station and put on a brave face. 

“I’m Doctor Karev, what’s the issue,” Jo looked from the nurse to the woman standing in front of her, feeling as if she’d just been punched in the gut. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Jo had never met Izzie Stevens, but the woman was unmistakable. Her painted lips turned down at the sight of Jo standing in front of her, obviously disappointed that she wasn’t Alex. The perfectly curled blonde hair and full face of makeup didn’t sit well with Jo, realizing with a flash of anger exactly why the woman was there.

“I’m not here for you, I’m here for Alex,” Izzie came around to stand a few feet in front of Jo, arms crossed as she stared her down. “Why don’t you tell me where your  _ ex _ husband is and we can all get along.”

“Oh I am not starting with you today, you need to take your pathetic ass back to Kansas,” Jo took a step forward, arms crossing to mirror Izzie’s stance. She knew she was attracting attention, she could see Levi frantically grasping for his pager out of the corner of her eye, but she couldn’t stop herself. “You know as well as I do that Alex doesn’t want to see you. You fucked him over and he’s moved on. And I know damn well he’s not going to want to talk to you.”

Izzie stared at Jo for a moment, her lips finally turning into a smile as she began to laugh at her. Jo could feel her blood boiling, her heart rate pounding loudly in her ears as she clenched her fists in an attempt to keep herself planted in her spot.

“Oh please, I’m sure that bratty kid of yours isn’t even his either, stop putting on this picture perfect princess show,” Izzie chuckled, narrowing her eyes as she saw Jo’s face redden. “Oh did I hit a nerve? Serves you right you-”

“You’re a sorry excuse for a mom if you think putting your kids through what you did was the right thing,” Jo’s voice rose and she took a final step towards Izzie, her face inches from the older woman’s. She shouldn’t retaliate, but Izzie had gotten under Jo’s skin and she wasn’t going to let her get the last word. “And you’re a shitty person on top of that for what you dragged Alex through. So you can talk about your stupid children of the corn and you can even talk about how much you fucked over Alex, but you do not get to talk about MY daughter. If I hear her name in your mouth again, so help me I will drag you back to Kansas by your hair myself you self absorbed home wrecking psycho.”

That set Izzie off, her hands coming up for Jo just as Alex ran up and pulled her away from the blonde. Jo, for what it was worth, was thankful that he’d come when he did because she wasn’t entirely sure that she could have kept her hands to herself.

“Jesus Christ! Don't you dare lay a hand on her Izzie,” Alex’s voice bellowed through the halls as he stared down his ex. “What the hell are you even doing here?”

“Well I came to check on you, but it seems that your washed up ex here has you fooled once again. Are you even sure this one is yours? Or maybe she trapped you on purpose this time,” Izzie sneered, eyes roaming down to Jo’s stomach. The dark blue scrubs were pulled tight against her abdomen as Alex held her, making it clear as day that she was pregnant. “You’re lucky you’re pregnant, I would ha-”

“ _ You’re _ lucky I’m pregnant,” Jo yelled back, Alex tightening his grip on her as she tried to break away from him. “You’d be out cold right now if I wasn’t you stupid bitch!”

“I don’t want you here Iz, and I really don’t appreciate you yelling at Jo like that,” Jo could feel the anger radiating off of Alex as he set Izzie straight. She could tell that Alex’s firm grip on her arms wasn’t just to her benefit, but his too as he held back his barely restrained rage. “Might I remind you that you’re the one that spent three years lying to my face about the paternity of your kids.”

“Now what the hell is happening in my hospital,” all three doctors turned as Miranda Bailey walked up to the scene, Meredith trailing behind her with a sour look on her face. “Izzie Stevens, I know damn well you’re not standing here right now screaming and threatening to physically attack a doctor of this hospital, and a pregnant one at that.”

“Doctor Bailey, I-”

“That’s enough from you,” Bailey fixed Izzie with a glare, eyes narrowing threateningly as she looked upon the doctor she’d once known so well. “You’re going to turn around and walk out of here and you are not to set foot in Grey Sloan again unless they bring you in a damn ambulance or so help me I will have the police here faster than you can say ‘LVAD wire’. Are we clear?”   
Watching the situation in front of her play out, Jo could feel the familiar pull of anxiety coursing through her. She’d been able to keep it at bay since Alex had come back home, but the ocean of worry and fear began to crest in her stomach again. Her heart began to beat unsteadily as she brought her hand to cover Alex’s on her arm, her feet feeling more unsteady the longer she dwelled on what just happened. 

“Jo? You okay?”

Jo’s eyes snapped up to Meredith, who was looking at her quizzically. She could feel Alex tensing behind her, his grip on her tightening as he looked her over. She could feel herself begin to sweat and her forehead heating up as she leaned her weight against Alex. 

“Babe? What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine, I’m just a little anxious,” Jo knew as soon as the words came out that Alex would understand what she meant. The nerves in her body were shot and she was pretty sure she’d pass out if she attempted to move out of Alex’s arms. She lowered her voice as she squeezed Alex’s hand, “I just really need to get out of here. Please.” 

Alex nodded to Meredith before he began to lead Jo away from the tense hallway, his arms never leaving their place around her shoulders as they headed for the attendings lounge. Her breathing was ragged by the time she sat on the couch in the lounge, Alex’s hand running over her back as sobs began to well up from within her. 

“You don’t believe her right? You don’t think I lied to you about Harper or this baby do you,” Jo tried to keep herself composed as she looked up at Alex, but the sad expression on his face made her begin to cry even more. “I swear I wouldn’t do that to you Alex, please don’t believe her.”

“Jo don’t listen to a word that comes out of her mouth. I know you’d never lie to me like that,” Alex wrapped his arm around Jo, bringing her into his side as she continued to cry. “I know you’re not trying to trap me, I know you. You’re a brilliant surgeon, an excellent mother and a fantastic wife, so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

Jo felt the wave of anxiety crash inside of her finally, Alex’s words doing little to ease her thoughts as she continued to sob loudly. She held a hand to her chest as her mind began to reel from the words that had been thrown at her. 

“I can’t… I can’t breathe,” Jo choked out between sobs, gasping loudly as she tried in vain to calm herself down. “I’m so sorry… Alex I’m sorry.”

“Babe, look at me, come on Jo,” Alex held his fingers under Jo’s chin and waited for her to look up and meet his eyes. “Breathe with me, in and out. You’re not doing yourself or the baby any good by freaking out. Deep breaths, there you go.”

Jo’s breathing evened out as she followed Alex’s instructions, moving a hand down to cradle her stomach as she closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing. When she was satisfied, she leaned her head against Alex’s forehead and took a deep breath. 

“I’m sorry it’s just… I wasn’t expecting that today. Or ever,” Jo let a low chuckle out, eyes fluttering open to meet Alex’s. “And I might’ve thrown up on the ER floor earlier but that’s not important.”

“Yeah you smell like fish guts,” Alex joked as he pressed a kiss to Jo’s hair. “Let’s go get Harper and go home. We can put on a movie and relax, okay?”

“That sounds like the best thing I’ve heard all day.”

+

“She picked the movie, I had no say in it,” Jo walked out of the bathroom and looked from Alex to Harper with a smirk. “Come on Jo, you know I can’t say no to her.”

“I know you can’t, you’re a big softie.”

Jo settled into Alex's left side, his hand coming around her to settle his hand against the curve of her stomach as Harper cuddled deeper into his right side. She’d showered and changed while Alex and Harper had set up in the living room to watch Moana upon Harper’s insistence. After their unsettling morning, neither of them wanted to be anywhere else.

“I’m sorry about what happened, if I had even the slightest idea that she would come here I would have told you Jo, believe me,” Alex’s tone was hushed as he kept his eyes on Harper. “That part of my life is over, I’m going to file a protective order for all three of us tomorrow.”

“Alex, I-”

“No, I can’t keep going to work worrying about you two every second of the day,” Alex finally turned his gaze back to Jo, eyes scanning her worriedly. “I… when I went back to Kansas to settle everything Izzie pulled some crazy stuff. Things I didn’t think she was capable of and things I don’t want you or Harper or this little one to be subjected to. So please, let me do this so I can feel like I’m doing something to help.”

Burrowing her head into Alex’s chest, Jo nodded and used one hand to run through Harper’s curls. The little girl meant more to her than anything, along with her sibling still growing in Jo’s womb. Her and Alex could agree on that much, so she would let him do what he felt was needed to protect them.

“Daddy quiet,” Harper poked at Alex and then pointed back to the television. “Watch movie.”

Jo felt Alex’s chest rumble as he laughed at Harper, her heart feeling lighter than it had in years as she enjoyed the quiet evening with her daughter and her… well Alex was definitely something. She wasn’t eager to label things, afraid it would disrupt the sense of peace they’d fallen into, but she had a good feeling about their relationship this time around.

“Mm I found another house for us to look at this weekend, it’s close to the hospital and it has a big backyard,” Jo looked up to Alex, who’s eyes were already on her. “I think we should put an offer in on this one. Trust me.”   
“I do, I’d trust you with my life,” a knock sounded at the door, Alex prying himself away from both girls who had no problems voicing their displeasure with him. “Sorry girls, I gotta get the pizza and I know neither of you were going to stand up and get it.”

“Just gives me an excuse to cuddle with Harps here,” Jo pulled Harper into her lap, the little girl giggling as her mom wrapped her up in her arms. 

Jo and Harper sat in silence for a minute, intently watching the movie playing out. When Alex didn’t return, Jo turned around to see what he was up to, only to find him still standing by the door.

“Alex?”

“She’s taking me to court,” Alex muttered, holding up a small stack of papers. “Izzie served me and she’s taking me to court for child support.”


	9. Chapter Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me? Updating? It's more likely than you think apparently.  
> I struggled, s t r u g g l e d. through this chapter but I think the rest will come a bit easier. S/O to Ren for proofing the first half of this and to Nat for demanding the second half hahaha.  
> Also I know that the plot for this whole child support thing is totally out of left field, but I'm going with the Grey's motto of "enough logic to be believable but probably not real world" so there's that.  
> Anyways enjoy!  
> PS: In the interest of me not sending myself to an early grave, there's no flashback in the beginning of this chapter!

“Can’t believe we have to go to court, this is a waste of my time and my good suit,” Alex grumbled as he tightened this tie. “I had to pull it out of the boxes and then get it dry cleaned, I should freaking bill her for this.”

“This’ll be over with in a few days and we can go back to our normal lives, well as normal as living in a loft overrun with cardboard boxes is,” Jo exited the bathroom and navigated around a stack of boxes before finally making it over to Alex, moving his hands and helping with his tie. “You look so handsome, if we didn’t have somewhere to be I would drag you back to bed.” 

“Well our bed isn’t even here for you to drag me to,” Alex moved his lips to kiss along Jo’s neck, a soft giggle coming from her as he did so. “Movers are coming in 45 minutes and we have to be out the door in 15.”

“That’s enough time for a quickie in the bathroom,” Jo’s proposition caused Alex to pull back and look her up and down with an amused expression. “What? I’m seriously horny all the time and you look good in a suit. I can’t help all the hormones running through my body. In fact! It’s your fault for getting me pregnant!”

Alex rolled his eyes, pressing one last kiss to Jo’s lips before pulling back from her.

“If I remember correctly, there were two of us in that elevator,” grabbing his keys and coat, Alex held his hand out for Jo to grab. “And I wasn’t the one gasping and moaning and practically  _ begging _ the whole time.”

“If you keep using verbs like that you’re gonna make us late,” Jo swatted at Alex’s ass before grabbing his outstretched hand, following him out of the loft.

As they locked the doors and headed downstairs, Alex let his hands fall to Jo’s growing bump, showcased by her form fitting black dress. At almost 18 weeks pregnant now, Jo couldn’t attempt to hide her bump anymore. She’d been nervous that her pregnancy would impact the court case one way or another, but Alex had reassured her that he just wanted her there with him, consequence be damned. Things had moved quickly though, and in the end, Jo had been called to testify as a character witness so her protests didn’t matter. 

The speed of the case making it to court probably had something to do with the fact that Izzie hadn’t bothered to fly back home to file a claim, instead calling the first paternity lawyer she could find on google and starting up the legal process in Washington. While it was a minor relief that Alex wouldn’t have to split time between Seattle and Kansas, both he and Jo were worried about how seriously Izzie had taken things.

Getting into the car and pulling on her seatbelt, Jo begins to ramble nervously. “How’s this going to work? I mean… they’re not yours, right? How is Izzie even allowed to do this?” 

A loud groan left Alex as he settled into the driver's seat of his car. He’d wondered the same thing, but he knew that him signing all those papers when he moved to Kansas three years ago had definitely helped Izzie’s case. Even back then, he’d thought in the back of his mind that he should have asked more questions, demanded a paternity test, but he hadn’t. All he could focus on were these two perfect children standing in front of him, children that he now knew weren’t even his. Alex’s blood began to boil with anger at the thought of Izzie lying to him for so long, but he let out a deep breath and began to drive towards the courthouse instead.

“I don’t know, but I saw those blood test results myself and there’s no damn way those kids are mine,” Jo’s fingers rubbed against Alex’s arm, calming him slightly. He looked to her briefly before speaking again. “I’m sorry you had to get dragged into this, I wish I could protect you from it all.” 

He could feel Jo’s gaze on him as his eyes stayed on the road. Alex could almost hear her thinking of how much she wanted to make Izzie pay for what she’d done to him. He was almost certain that pregnant or not, she’d fight Izzie if she came at her again. As if reading his mind Jo let out a chuckle and squeezed his arm reassuringly. 

“I’m a big girl, I can stand up to bullies on the playground,” Jo squeezed Alex’s arm once more before bringing her hand to rest on her growing bump. “Let’s just get through today, this isn’t going to go longer than a day once they figure out you’re not those kids dad.”

But it did end up lasting longer… Once they got to the courthouse, Alex realized with a sense of horror that Izzie wasn’t messing around. She had two lawyers and was wearing a dress that looked like it cost more than his paycheck. And she wasn’t holding back anything, her lawyers showed that loud and clear.

“My client went through multiple rounds of chemotherapy, there’s no possible way that she could conceive without the help of artificial insemination and the sample that Doctor Karev provided,” Izzie’s lawyer was a short, pudgy man whose voice echoed through the courtroom unforgivingly. “We’re asking for Doctor Karev to back pay child support for the three years he knew about and took parental responsibility for both children as well as therapy for the children in the wake of his sudden departure.”

“Your Honor, these claims are absurd! Doctors Karev and Stevens performed a blood test that showed that one of the children has a genetic disorder that neither of them have, meaning that if Doctor Stevens did indeed give birth to both children, that Doctor Karev could not be their biological father,” Alex’s lawyer fought back, eyeing Izzie and her lawyers as she spoke. “All we’re asking for is Doctor Karev to be released of all parental responsibility for both children and for Doctor Stevens to repay him the legal fees for these proceedings, as well as cover any other expenses he’s incurred while being involved in this trial.” 

A quick and calculated silence followed the statement, Alex’s eyes flitting nervously from Izzie to her lawyer to Jo, who sat behind him with her hands nervously running over her bump. He’d seen Izzie watching her with a venomous expression earlier, Alex’s grip around her waist tightening as they’d shuffled into the courtroom.

“Your Honor, we’d like to call Doctor Josephine Brooke Karev to the stand before we proceed,” Izzie’s other lawyer, a tall woman named Eleanor Krause, stood and gestured towards the witness stand. She wore an almost permanent scowl on her thin face, her dark eyes staring menacingly around the courtroom. “I have a few questions for the other Doctor Karev.”

Jo rose and quietly made her way towards the stand, eyes meeting Alex’s briefly before swearing in and turning to face Miss Krause.

“Doctor Karev, are you and Doctor Alexander Michael Karev still married?”

“No we are currently divorced,” Jo’s voice was clear and stoic as she answered, staring directly at the lawyer questioning her. “We’ve been divorced for almost three years now.”

“And the dissolution of your marriage occurred when separated he moved to Kansas to be with Doctor Stevens?”

“Correct…,” then quickly adding, “after learning of their existence, Alex determined he needed to sever all ties with Seattle to be there completely for his children. At least who he thought were his children.”

Krause’s eyes lit up suddenly, a wicked smile appearing on her face as she stared down Jo. Alex could feel his stomach drop, knowing that whatever the woman was going to say next would not be friendly or civil.

“And you also have a child fathered by Doctor Alexander Michael Karev, is that right?”

“Yes, my daughter Harper Josephine Karev, who is two, and the child I’m carrying now are both Alex’s,” Jo’s brow furrowed, hand settling onto her abdomen as she watched the woman take a step closer to her. “I don’t see what that has to do with the case at hand though.”

“I just want to know if the other Doctor Karev paid you child support during your first pregnancy and the two years of your daughter’s life that he wasn’t present,” Krause’s voice was practically dripping with malice as she stared Jo down. “I mean, we are here to make sure that he’s doing his duty as a father, whether he’s in the same state as his children or not, right? So, has he been paying child support to you, Doctor Karev?”

Jo’s eyes flitted to Alex nervously, his own telling her that it was okay to tell the truth. To be honest, he was scared what Jo’s answer would affect in the case, but he knew that at the end of the day he wouldn’t have to pay a dime to Izzie because her kids were not his.

“No he hasn’t, but he didn’t know he had a daughter until four months ago,” Jo argued, turning momentarily to the judge. “He’s been a present and wonderful father since he’s known about Harper.”

“Doctor Karev, are you sure beyond a reasonable doubt that both of your children are indeed Alex’s children? Did you not have your daughter shortly after your now ex husband left you?”

“What’s the relevance here,” Alex’s lawyer finally stood and challenged the woman accosting Jo. “Doctor Josephine Karev’s children shouldn’t have any effect on her ex husband's child support case! It’s cruel and malicious to be questioning her like this on the stand.”

Alex turned to glare at Izzie, angered that she wore the same expression as her shifty lawyer. She knew about what Krause was plotting, he would put money on the fact that she’d planted the seed of whatever cruel idea it was in her head.

“I’m just questioning Doctor Alexander Karev’s intentions when it comes to his children, however many that may be,” Krause shrugged, eyes narrowing in Jo’s direction. “You’ve filed papers to move forward with adding Alexander to your daughter’s legal paperwork, is that correct?”

That all too familiar feeling of horror flooded Alex’s senses again, overtaking everything as he watched Jo answer affirmatively, her eyes moving to him again. There were tears welling up in them now, the fear he felt in the room spreading to her as well. His breathing hitched as he listened to Izzie’s lawyer prattle on once more, her biting voice breaking through his mental fog.

“I’d like to request a hold on any formal paternity proclamations concerning Doctor Alexander Michael Karev’s alleged children until their paternity can be confirmed via DNA testing,” Krause moved her line of sight to Jo once more, a sharp note ringing through the courtroom as she delivered her final, jarring blow. “I’d like to request that all  _ four _ of Doctor Karev’s alleged children are tested, I believe that Josephine here is still well within the window to have an amniocentesis performed.” 

“No, hell no!” Alex stood from his chair, eyes blazing as he stared down Krause. “I am not letting you poke and prod my wife just for a damn child support case, especially one she’s not directly involved in.”

Both Alex and his lawyer turned pleadingly towards the judge, who was eyeing both Izzie and Alex warily. He was never one to feel anxious, but he couldn’t help the worry mounting in his chest. Finally, the judge spoke, his words directed towards Izzie’s lawyers.

“How long would this process take?”

“If we proceeded with the amniocentesis, we’d have results in as soon as three weeks,” Krause’s eyes moved to Alex, a sick look of delight glowing in them. “If you’re uncomfortable with that though, we can draw this case out until the baby is born.”

“I’ll do it,” Jo’s voice rang out before anyone else could answer, making all eyes in the courtroom turn to her. Alex felt his heart constrict as he watched her speak. “I’ll do the amnio, I don’t mind.”

“With Doctor Josephine Karev’s confirmation, I’m adjourning this case until the DNA results for Alexis Isobel Stevens, Eli George Stevens, Harper Josephine Karev, and Doctor Josephine Karev’s unborn child come back. Court adjourned, you may leave now,” the judge rose and left the courtroom quickly, not bothering to witness the pure mayhem that descended upon the room.

“You did this on purpose,” Alex was up and out of his seat before anyone could stop him, feet heading towards Izzie who wore a smug expression as she looked him over. “You disgust me, you’ve weaponized your own children against me and now you’re trying to jeopardize the health of my unborn child and wife?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about Alex,” Izzie batted her eyelashes in Alex’s direction, her self satisfied smirk growing as she watched him become more angry. “Looking forward to seeing you again!”

Before he could respond to Izzie, a gentle hand pressed into Alex’s back and ushered him towards the exit. Jo’s presence, even if he hadn’t looked into her eyes yet, was an instant calming effect over him. 

As soon as they stepped into the hallway, Jo and Alex were in each other’s embrace, steadying breaths matching the others as they tried to come to terms with what had just happened. Her face pressed against his chest, Alex could feel the slow shuddering breaths that left Jo as he held her. He knew the questions Izzie's lawyer had posed were ones that were a sore spot for Jo, ones she’d begged him not to believe as she’d cried into his arms just a few weeks earlier. 

“Just one punch,” Jo mumbled the words against Alex’s chest, looking up to make sure he heard her. “Please? I just wanna punch her one time.”

Alex chuckled, looking down at Jo with a glint in his eye, “You know I can’t let you do that, even though it would make me happier than I care to admit.”

“You kept calling me your wife in there,” Jo pressed her hands against the lapels of Alex’s suit, avoiding his stare as she fixed her gaze on her hands. “I don’t hate hearing you say that again.”

The words made Alex’s heart stutter under Jo’s gentle touch, his mind racing as he took in fully what she was saying. Did she really want to be his wife again? After years of him being away, of her raising their daughter on her own? After he had all but abandoned her and told her via letter? 

Watching Jo for another moment, Alex brought his fingers under her chin and met her eyes, “You wanna marry me again? After all the shit we’ve been through?”

“For some reason I do, you make me better,” Jo finally lifted her gaze back to Alex’s face, eyes welling with tears as she spoke. “You’ve given me the best things in my life, you’ve made me a better person. And if we can get through some of the things that have been thrown at us, then I truly think we can get through everything. I love you Alex, more than I can ever say to you. I know you think you’ve fucked up, but through the past few months you’ve shown me how much you’ve grown.”

Not knowing what to say, Alex leaned down and captured Jo’s lips with his own. If there was one thing that was almost always blaringly clear for him, it was that he didn’t deserve the woman in his arms. He couldn’t begin to fathom how much it had taken to forgive him, to even trust him again after what he’d done. But just as she’d always done, Jo saw him for who he really was underneath all of his layers of bullshit. 

“We can go right now, we are in the courthouse,” Alex joked, prompting Jo to roll her eyes and gently slap his chest before walking towards the exit. “What? Not a funny joke? We had fun last time and the SUV has a bigger backseat than the Audi did.”   
“Mmm yeah, you know we made a baby that night, right?,” Jo raised her eyebrows, a mischievous grin lighting up her face as she took in Alex’s shocked expression. “You have really good luck, you know? You made one baby in the backseat of a car and another on the floor of an elevator.”

A peel of laughter escaped Jo as she tried to unsuccessfully move away from Alex’s grip on her hips, instead falling back into his arms as his lips grazed her neck. 

“You’re gonna be the death of me, woman,” Alex whispered the words as he turned Jo around in his arms. “Weren’t you just trying to jump me in the bathroom a few hours ago? Is the car not up to your standards?”

“No, I’m just thinking that Link is keeping Harper overnight and our bed probably got to the new house already,” Jo smirked in satisfaction at the dark look that fell over Alex’s eyes at her suggestion. “Now's as good a time as any to start christening the place. Unless you can’t keep up with a younger woman?” 

“Josephine Karev, you know I can keep up with you any day of the week,” Alex’s lips ghosted Jo’s ear as he lowered his voice, pressing her closer to him and making his aroused state perfectly clear for her. “Let’s go, before we have no choice but to finish things up in the car.”

+

Twenty four hours after leaving the courthouse, Alex and Jo find themselves in an exam room on the OB floor. With the amniocentesis being court ordered and both of them wanting to get things over as quickly as possible, they’d booked the first appointment that was available. 

“How are you not nervous,” Alex sat beside Jo, her hand in his as Carina ran an ultrasound wand over Jo’s stomach. “I mean I’m not trying to make you nervous, but you know what happens here!”

“Can’t be any worse than a 15 hour unmedicated labor that ended with a 9 pound baby making its way out of your vagina,” Jo shrugged, Carina chuckling quietly next to her. “I came up with some very interesting curse words that day.”

Alex and Jo both watched the ultrasound screen intently, their baby reaching one leg up to kick at the probe. Carina furrowed her brow, watching the baby move languidly on the screen, “You’re going to have to get them to calm down, I cannot go in while they’re kicking all around like that.”

“Talk to them, they always calm down when you talk to them,” Jo turned to Alex and raised her eyebrows. “Go on! I don’t have all day to lay here Alex.”   
Alex looked between Jo and Carina before leaning down and speaking in the same mellow tone that Jo had become so used to hearing while they laid in bed at night, “Hey kiddo, you gotta slow down in there. Your mom and I are tangled up in this stupid ass thing-”

“Alex!”

“And we’d really appreciate it if you cooperated so we could get this done,” Alex glanced to the ultrasound screen, noticing that the erratic movements had lessened and the baby had calmed. “See, that’s more like it. You know your sister is very excited to meet you, she keeps running around talking about how she’s gonna be a ‘big shitser’ which is super adorable if not the most inappropriate thing to come out of a two year olds mouth.

“She wants to name you Elsa or Hei Hei, those are the options I was presented with a few nights ago anyways. I don’t think she really gets it, but she’s gonna be great,” Jo’s eyes closed quickly as Carina pulled out the needle, her hand squeezing Alex’s. “Okay you gotta be super still now, mom’s got a big needle in her-”

“You are not helping me, Alex.”   
“And she’s all done! Look at that, easy peasy,” Alex pressed a kiss to Jo’s forehead, following the once again active baby on the screen. “Hey look at that, baby’s flashing us!”

Jo sat up quickly, eyes scanning the screen as well with a laugh, “Well that’s one way to do a gender reveal.”

Alex leaned up to kiss Jo, laughter bubbling from both of them as they let the realization sink in. They had a house, they had two healthy kids, they had the promise of a great big future ahead of them. Court case be damned, they were happy and things were going right between them for once.


	10. Chapter Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen... I'm not crazy about this chapter... like at all... BUT we only have ONE MORE CHAPTER left of this series! I'm getting emotional thinking about it... anyways I hope you guys enjoy this more than I did writing it :)

**_TW: Depictions of Domestic Abuse & Miscarriage_ **

_ The room was dark, creaking floorboards alerting her to the fact that she wasn’t alone anymore. Eyes cracking open, she watched for the telltale shadow that would appear in the dim hallway light to let her know he was home. She prayed for just a moment that she was hearing things, that he wasn’t actually there.  _

_ Of course she was wrong, her body flinching as he clambered into the room loudly. She should be used to this by now, the chill of fear running up her spine as she prepares for the worst. But she isn’t, she hopes she never is because that means there’s a sliver of hope left for her.  _

_ Her fingers curl around the small swell of her stomach. It’s unnoticeable to everyone except her, the only person who knows about the little life growing there. She closes her eyes, a single tear running down her face as she apologizes to them, to her baby.  _

_ “You stupid slut, I saw what you did at…” _

_ The rest of his words don’t matter, she tunes them out as soon as his fist lands on her face. The blows continue, she tries to curl up and shield herself but he’s not giving any form of mercy tonight. Before she knows it, she’s splayed out with his feet and fists taking turns pummeling into her ribs. She can feel the bones cracking, sharp pain radiating underneath her skin as she tries unsuccessfully to keep her tears at bay.  _

_ He finishes finally, satisfied with himself enough to step away and brush off his hands as if he’d just gone through a rough cardio circuit at the gym.  _

_ “Hope that teaches you a lesson, Brooke. I’m going to shower, you better be cleaned up by the time I come back.” _

_ As soon as he’s out of her sight, she looks down at the damage he’s done. Bruises are starting to form almost everywhere on her body, blood stemming from her forehead. Her body is aching, but she forces herself up and out of the bed. A look behind her reveals the puddle of blood she’d been laying in, the bright red staining the sheets and her pajama bottoms.  _

_ “I’m so sorry,” her voice cracks as she lays a hand on her stomach, tears streaming down her face. “I promise I’m leaving, this will never happen again.” _

Jo bolts upright in bed, sweat soaking her body as she comes to. The nightmare dissolves from her vision, but the feeling it leaves makes her skin crawl and her chest grow tight. She can feel herself hyperventilating, her lungs constricting as she tries to get air back into them. 

“Jo? What’s wrong? Is the baby okay?,” Alex is up and next to her in seconds, one hand spreading over her back to rub circles as the other splayed against her rounded abdomen. “Babe?”

She shakes her head, body deflating as she lets out a quiet sob. Her fingers rest over Alex’s on her belly as she leans into him, “I- it was… nightmare.”

The sweat pooling on her skin doesn't help the nightmare slip away, the perspiration reminding her of the sticky feeling of blood clinging to her skin. The radio silence from the baby in her womb doesn’t help her anxiety either, the lack of movement making her mind race unpleasantly as Alex’s fingers card through her hair. 

“Jo, baby you gotta breathe,” Alex’s voice is slow and soothing in her ear, his tone calm as he tries to ease the panic building in her chest. For years she was positive that she’d never be able to get the feeling of Paul’s hands on her out of her head, but the way that Alex’s fingers trail so lightly over her hot skin helps remind her that things have changed. “That’s better, keep breathing. You’re okay, I’m right here.”

As the visions of her past finally begin to fade from her vision, a swift kick hits her stomach under Alex’s hand. Relief begins to course through her then, her mind finally catching up to the fact that the memory that had plagued her dream was far in her past. 

“I… I keep having the same nightmare about…,” Jo still can’t bring herself to say the words, to admit what Paul had put her through out loud. Instead, she goes with a roundabout answer. “This is my fourth pregnancy and I still can’t shake that feeling that everything is going to come down around me.”

She’s never told Alex about the losses she’d endured with Paul, she’d never had a reason to, but the way he presses his lips against her forehead assures her that he was nothing except supportive. 

“Well I’ll be here to catch whatever fallout there is, I always will be,” Alex pulled Jo closer to him, then dragged them both back down to the mattress. “Go back to sleep, we have a long day ahead and I’ll be here the whole time.”

Jo settled into Alex’s embrace, fingers clutching lightly at his shirt as she dozed off. Alex couldn’t find sleep again though, eyes watching Jo tentatively as his fingers traced patterns into her expanding belly. 

She’d never talked in detail about Paul, only snippets here and there that painted a clear enough picture of the horrors that Jo had gone through. Knowing that she’d been pregnant twice before Harper though, that made things seem so much more real for Alex as he felt a flutter of kicks under his fingers. 

Sleep finally found Alex, whispers of promises on his lips as he held Jo close to him. 

+

A nervous energy radiated off both Alex and Jo as they stepped back into the courthouse. Harper had just been dropped off at Link and Amelia’s, the little girl slightly confused as to why both of her parents had teary eyes. Deep down, they knew what the verdict of the day would be, but the tense environment of the courthouse was getting to both of them.

“Oh shit, she really dragged her kids in to see this,” Alex groaned as he and Jo walked the halls of the courthouse, his eyes watching the two young children run around Izzie and her lawyers. “I haven’t seen them since I left… knowing Izzie they still think I really am their dad.”   
Jo studied the melancholy look on Alex’s face as he looked towards the kids he’d helped raise the past couple of years. She couldn’t help the raging anger she felt towards Izzie for what she’d done, but she reeled it in for Alex’s sake. 

“Hey, you’re doing the right thing by going through this stupid trial. At the end of the day what those kids deserve is the truth,” Jo placed her hands on Alex’s shoulders, looking up at him with a reassuring smile. “And if for some reason the test comes back and says they are yours then we’ll figure everything out. Don’t worry about today, it’ll all work out.”

Wrapping his arms around her waist, Alex leaned down and kissed Jo sweetly. Leave it to her to know exactly what to say when his ex took him to court and the kids he thought were his showed up to witness the fallout. The pair broke apart when a booming voice announced that the judge was ready for them.

Heart racing, Alex walked into the courtroom with Jo’s hand clasped tightly in his own. He eyed Izzie, Alexis, and Eli who all sat together on the opposite side of the room. If he squinted hard enough, he could see similarities between himself and the two bouncing children, but it paled in comparison to the way Harper looked almost identical to him. The little girl, who’s first two years of life he had missed, made the same faces he did and had the same sparkling eyes as his younger sister. Never for a moment did he doubt that she was his, the moment Alex laid his eyes on Harper as she ran towards Jo he knew that she was his daughter.

“We’re here to settle the child support case filed by Doctor Isobel Stevens against Doctor Alexander Karev,” the judge’s voice pulled Alex from his thoughts, his hand squeezing Jo’s as they waited for him to continue. “I have the paternity results for Alexis Isobel Stevens and Eli George Stevens before me now”   
The tension in the room was palpable, Alex feeling as if his breath was being held back by some unknown force as he waited for the results to be announced out loud. He could feel Jo’s foot bouncing rhythmically next to him, a sure sign that she was just as nervous as he was. Finally, the judge spoke again, “These results certify that neither Alexis or Eli Stevens are the biological children of Doctor Alexander Karev.”

The burst of air he’d been so desperately craving finally rushed into Alex’s lungs as the words he already knew to be true were confirmed for him. He could feel Jo kissing his cheek, mumbling some string of encouragement that was lost in the haze of his mind. A small part of him was sad, thinking about the time and love he had invested into Izzie’s children, but it faded when he remembered that he had two biological children with Jo that meant more than anything to him.

Izzie must have been on the same wavelength as Alex because she spoke up next, voice dripping with malice as she glared at Alex and Jo, “Do you have the results for the other two kids? Surely they can’t both be Alex’s.”

Before Jo had a chance to jump out of her seat and rush towards Izzie, the judge read out the rest of the test results, “Both the paternity test for Harper Josephine Karev and Doctor Josephine Karev’s amniocentesis results confirmed that Doctor Alexander Karev is the biological father of both children.”

Upon hearing that news, Alex moved out of his catatonic state to pull Jo into his side, his lips pressing a kiss into her hair as he spoke, “Told you, I never doubted you for a second.”

“Upon receiving these test results, I’ve made a ruling on the outcome of this case,” all eyes in the courtroom turned to the judge, his eyes scanning the two parties tentatively before reading the papers before him. “Since neither of Doctor Isobel Stevens' children are biologically Doctor Alexander Karev’s, I’ve ruled that her child support claim will not be accepted. Doctor Stevens, you will repay Doctor Karev any legal and personal fees he’s incurred during this trial for the inconvenience you’ve caused him. Furthermore, I’ve pushed through the legal paperwork filed in the interest of Harper Josephine Karev so that Doctor Alexander Karev is now legally her father. Case dismissed, court adjourned.”

Alex didn’t think he had ever felt this relieved in his whole life. He pulled Jo into his embrace, kissing her soundly as she laughed away a few stray tears. The worry and anxiety consuming both of them had faded away the moment the judge had read out the results, their fate seemingly sealed in the best way possible.

As Jo and Alex made their way out of the courtroom, Izzie caught Alex’s eyes. She wore a scowl as she stared them down, eyes narrowing at the younger woman as she passed her by. Tightening his grip around Jo’s shoulder, Alex led her past the blonde and into the hallway they'd just stood in a few weeks earlier. 

“I told you everything would work out,” Jo smiled up at Alex, hands smoothing over the blue dress she’d picked out that morning. “Thank god too because I’m pretty sure nothing else is gonna fit me. Now, let’s go celebrate. Lunch?”   
Alex glanced at Jo with a smirk, one hand ducking into the pocket of his suit jacket as he spoke to her, “I actually had another idea, if you were up for it.”   
From his jacket, Alex produced a velvet box that he popped open to reveal a set of silver rings. The diamonds that glittered back at Jo instantly made her eyes water, her gaze moving from the box up to Alex’s face. 

“Marry me again, Jo. I promise this will be the last time,” a chuckle left Jo as Alex spoke, their eyes meeting in a tender gaze. “I love you, it took me so long to realize that and then I let you go, but I swear I’m never gonna leave again. You and Harper and this baby mean too much to me. So… will you? Marry me again?”

“Yes, yes, yes. Of course I’ll marry you Alex,” Jo nodded, a watery laugh escaping her as she leaned up to kiss Alex. “On one condition though.”

“I would do anything for you to marry me Jo, you know that,” Alex smirked, his forehead leaning against hers as he chuckled. “I’ve only asked you about a hundred times.”

“Let’s go right now,” Alex’s eyebrows rose in awe as he stared at Jo. “I don’t wanna wait, I wanna be married to you again. And I really don’t wanna have to file a bunch of paperwork to get you on this kids birth certificate once they’re born.”

A cheesy grin settled onto Alex’s face as he watched Jo through misty eyes. He’d spent so many nights in a lonely bed in Kansas thinking about this moment, dreaming about a future where he got a second chance with Jo. Truthfully he’d always thought that the dreams were just wishful thinking, but standing here now with her in front of him and a new life bursting between them, he couldn’t believe how lucky he’d gotten.

“Well then let’s go,” Alex grabbed Jo’s hand and began walking through the halls of the courthouse, their laughter echoing off the stone walls as they made their way towards the marriage clerk's office. “Do you think we can get our frequent visitors card stamped?”

“Alex!” 


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it, my final chapter of Hesitate... I actually cried a bit finishing this off because I’ve been working on it since early June and we’re halfway through October now. I wanted to thank you guys SO MUCH for your continued support through comments, likes, and just general support. I know that this has taken forever to finish but I’m grateful that y’all have stuck through it with me. 
> 
> Thank you again and I hope you enjoy this final chapter.
> 
> xoxo Nina

_ Pull me close and I'll hold you tight _

_ Don't be scared 'cause I'm on your side _

_ Know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you _

_ I will take your pain _

_ And put it on my heart _

_ I won't hesitate _

_ Just tell me where to start _

_ I thank the oceans for giving me you _

_ You saved me once and I'll save you too _

_ I won't hesitate for you _

_ A Few Months Later…  _

“You look so handsome, I’d jump you right now if I didn’t have a surgery with Meredith to get to,” Jo grinned up at Alex as she straightened his tie, his eyes rolling as he grabbed her hands in his. “I for one am very proud that you got this office back. It’s been nice not having to fight for on call rooms when I need a nap.”

“You’re just using me for my office, you don’t even care that I’m Chief again,” Alex chuckled as Jo wore an offended look on her face at his accusation. “You sure you should be going into surgery? You’ve been pretty out of it the past day.”

Jo’s eyebrows raised, eyes narrowing at Alex as she glared at him, “Are you insinuating that I’m too pregnant to operate,  _ Chief _ ?”

“No I'm telling you, as your  _ husband _ , that you should take it easy,” Alex wrapped his arms around Jo, eyeing her as she continued to scowl at him. “I know you worked until your due date with Harper, but you’re taking care of a toddler and dealing with me. Maybe it’s time to take a break before you stress yourself into labor.”

Jo shrugged off Alex’s arm on her shoulder, her own arms crossed over her belly as she walked away from him. She knew she was only a week and half until her due date, but she wasn’t going to let that stop her from working. 

“I’m perfectly fine Alex, I don’t need you hovering over my shoulder at all hours of the day,” Jo called over her shoulder as she walked out of his office. “I’ll see you later, I have a surgery to get to.” 

Alex watched as Jo left his office, sighing as he fell into his desk chair. He’d been Chief for two months now and had never felt a stronger need to kick his wife’s stubborn ass. Even Amelia had agreed to go on an earlier maternity leave, in fact she’d been grateful that he’d offered it to her. But Jo didn’t want to admit that she might need some help and some rest before their second child came into the world. 

“She’s gonna be the death of me,” Alex mumbled to himself as he began to sort through the paperwork on his desk. 

-

45 minutes after his wife storms out of his office, Alex’s phone dings with a text from Meredith: 

_ Operating in OR 3. Jo looks like shit.  _

Furrowing his eyebrows, Alex decided to check out what was happening for himself. After walking down towards the operating galleries, he quietly slipped into one above Meredith and Jo’s OR. He watched with piqued interest as Meredith worked on one side of the operating table and Jo stood almost catatonic on the other side. 

“Jo, will you please go sit down,” Meredith’s voice boomed through the OR and the gallery above, her eyes moving momentarily to the woman across from her. “I can see you wincing in pain from here.” 

“They’re Braxton Hicks, I’m fine,” Alex could hear Jo’s strained tone of voice even from so far away. “Can you please stop badgering me about this? I’m fine, I’m going to work until my due date just like I did last time.”

“Last time you went into labor five days after your due date and you pushed your body so far that I had to hook you up to an IV for three days after you had Harper,” Alex’s eyebrows raised at Meredith’s words, not knowing exactly what had happened after Harper had been born. “You need to take care of yourself and your baby Jo.”

Jo’s fingers moved from her side to the operating table, gripping it tightly as she took slow and deep breaths. Alex left the gallery, moving quickly to the OR with only Jo on his mind. When he reappeared in the scrub room, he watched his wife’s body curl in on itself as she tried to remain standing upright. 

“Jo, get out of there,” Jo’s head whipped around at the sound of Alex’s voice, one hand pressed firmly against her stomach as she looked at him. “Come on, I’m not gonna ask again. You can barely stand up straight.”

Without much protest, Jo walked out of the OR and into the scrub room, ripping her mask and gown off before beginning to scrub her hands. 

“I told you I’m fine Alex,” one of Jo’s hands slipped down to the edge of the metal sink, knuckles going white as she gripped tightly. “They’re just Braxton Hicks. You don’t need to pull me out of surgery for this.”

Alex looked from his watch back to Jo, resting his hand against her back as he fixed her with a serious stare, “That’s twice in the past six minutes that you’ve had to stop what you’re doing and clench your fists. I’m pretty sure you’re having contractions. Go home babe, please I’m begging you.”

Jo groaned, turning to Alex with an angry glint in her eye as she stared him down, “I’m not going home, I am fine and I’m going to keep working. So stop nagging me.”

Taking a deep breath, Alex watched as Jo dried her hands off and turned to leave the scrub room. He grimaced as he said his next words, knowing he would piss his wife off with them, “I’m sending you on maternity leave, effective immediately. As the Chief, not as your husband.”

Jo’s entire body stiffened, stopping a foot from the door and turning back towards Alex. The angry expression on her face grew tenfold and she looked up at Alex. 

“Are you kidding me? Alex you can’t do that! I’m perfectly fine,” Jo’s voice was bordering on a scream as she pointed at Alex. “You can be concerned as my husband all day long, but you can’t use your Chief powers just because you don’t agree with what I’m doing.”

“You couldn’t even pick up a scalpel to cut in there, I’m trying to make sure you don’t end up giving birth to our kid in the middle of operating,” Alex threw his hands up, eyes narrowing at Jo. “I was perfectly content letting you stress yourself out until you just passed out from exhaustion so that maybe you’d learn a lesson, but the second you start putting other people’s jobs and lives on the line it becomes my problem as the Chief. Go home Jo and don’t come back until you're about to give birth.” 

Eyes watering, Jo stormed out of the scrub room, slamming the door behind her. Running his hands down his face, Alex let a loud groan out. The last thing he’d wanted to do was upset Jo, but her stubborn nature made things extremely difficult to work around. He knew what he’d done was a low blow, but he also knew that she wouldn’t have stopped until something happened to her or their child. 

-

It was almost 7o’clock when Alex pulled into the driveway of his and Jo’s home. Harper was fast asleep in the backseat, soft snores coming from her as Alex debated how terrible it would be if he just turned around and left. He knew Jo was going to be furious with him and he didn’t want to deal with it, but he’d promised her he would come back. He was done running and ruining things between them because he couldn’t handle a simple conversation. 

Carefully grabbing Harper and the dinner he’d picked up, Alex made his way into the house as quietly as possible. He set dinner in the kitchen and got Harper into bed before he checked on Jo. Their house, which they’d only been in for four months, was quieter than he’d ever heard it. There were no excited giggles, no music playing, no showers running. The complete and utter silence was driving him insane as he slipped into the bedroom he shared with Jo. 

She was laying in bed, on his side he noted, curled in on herself and clutching a pillow tightly. While it pained him to see her upset, he was glad that she’d at least been able to sleep for once. Jo had spent the past two nights tossing and turning in bed, sleep evading her as the baby in her womb did somersaults. Alex toed off his shoes before settling himself behind Jo, his hands running across her back as she slowly woke up. 

“Mmm what time is it,” Jo slowly turned around to press her face against Alex’s chest as best as she could with her belly between them. “I feel like I slept for three days.”

“It’s almost 7 now, Harper is asleep and I have dinner downstairs from the Chinese place you like,” Alex’s voice was low and soft as he ran his hands down to Jo’s belly, feeling the swift movements of the baby inside waking up with their mom. Jo let out a contented groan as her fingers came up to the curls at the nape of Alex’s neck, her body instinctively moving closer towards him. “I’m sorry about what happened today, you know I’d never use my power as Chief if I didn’t have to. I’m just worried about you, I don’t want you to hurt yourself. And I know you can handle it all because you're a superhero, but please let me look after you for a little bit.”

A pang of sadness ran through Alex as he realized just how much he’d missed as he watched a few tears escape Jo’s eyes. He knew this hadn’t been easy for her, the past couple months since he’d shown up throwing her whole life for a loop, but he wanted to make it up to her, he didn’t want to hurt her again. 

“Are you okay, you know pain wise? Baby still giving you a hard time,” a hard kick met Alex’s hand at his question, both he and Jo laughing at the interruption. 

“Better than before, I’m not contracting anymore,” Jo sighed, fiddling with her wedding rings as she avoided looking up at Alex. “I’m sorry… you were right about me pushing myself too much. I was in a lot of pain earlier and I shouldn’t have gone into that surgery. And… I do need to take it easy. I’m so used to just powering through all the shit that gets thrown at me by myself, I didn’t have help last time and I was with Harper for two years by myself. I love you, so freaking much Alex, but when it comes to parenting I’m not used to having someone here to help.” 

His lips pressed against her forehead, Alex held Jo tightly as he relished in the feeling of her in his arms, “I promise I’ll be here to help as much as I can. I’ll wake up every night if this kid has colic, no complaints.”

Jo chuckled, finally lifting her head and kissing Alex soundly. Her fingers wound their way back into his hair, one hand trailing down his body to rake across his chest. 

“You know, sex is supposed to help induce labor,” a grin spread across Jo’s face as Alex laughed, dipping his head down to her neck. 

“You keep that baby in there, I have a little while before my leave starts,” despite his words, Alex’s lips continued trailing down her neck, fingers following the hot trail he’d created. “Dinners gonna get cold.”

“That’s fine,” Jo’s voice was a moan as she pulled lightly at Alex’s hair. “Keep going, screw dinner.”

-

Alex is rounding his way back to his office when he sees her in the hospital again. He’d sent her on maternity leave just three days ago and she was already back, instantly raising his blood pressure. His wife had been relaxing, napping as much as she could between her manic cleaning spurts, but he could tell that she was itching to get back into the OR armed with a scalpel. 

“Jo!”

Her head swivels towards him, one hand settling on to her burgeoning stomach as she begins to walk slowly toward him. Alex can already feel his anger rising, knowing that he’d probably caught Jo trying to weasel her way into a surgery. 

“Hey, I just got here,” Jo breathed out as Alex stood in front of her. “Why are you glaring at me like I just ran over your dog?”

“You need to go home, I told you that you can’t operate,” Alex placed his hands on Jo’s shoulders, eyeing her warily as she furrowed her eyebrows. “You’re not about to trick me into letting you work just because you bat your eyelashes at me.”

“Alex, I-“

“No buts, you need to go home and rest,” Alex tried to push Jo back the way she came, but her feet stayed planted firmly on the ground. “Jo, let’s go.”

“Alex!”

He turns then, Jo’s hands gripping his arm that’s still settled on her shoulder. Her eyes are narrowed and her breathing is shallow as she stares up at him, looking almost as if she might slap him. 

“If you don’t let me talk to you, I will give birth to your child in this hallway,” Jo squeezed Alex’s arm as she took a deep breath, eyes closing as she spoke through gritted teeth. “My water broke half an hour ago, that’s why I’m here.”

Eyes blown wide, Alex finally takes in Jo’s almost disheveled state and the annoyed expression on her face as she glared at him. Her fingers were gripping his arm, nails sinking into his skin even through his lab coat as she tried to remain composed. 

“Oh shit okay, well let’s go then,” Alex pressed his hand against Jo’s back, leading her toward the maternity ward. “Wait, did you drive here? While you were in labor?”

“Let’s talk about that later, I’ve been having contractions since you left for work this morning,” Jo stopped Alex from walking further, head leaning against his shoulder as her breathing became shallow. “Jesus, I forgot how terrible this is. No more after this one, screw the extra bedrooms. I can’t push out another gigantic Karev baby.”

They slowly make their way down the halls and to the maternity ward, Jo stopping every few minutes to breathe through a contraction as Alex rubbed her back comfortingly. His gaze continued to float nervously to his watch, noticing how close Jo’s contractions were as they finally got settled into a room. Carina stepped into the room, greeting them both as she set up.   
“I swear if you tell me I can’t have drugs I might scream,” Jo pushed her face into Alex’s chest and let out a loud groan as Carina checked her, a laugh coming from the obstetrician. “What? Why are you laughing? That can’t be a good sign.”   
Looking from Jo to Carina, a grimace quickly formed on Alex's face as he realized that she’d come to the same conclusion he had on their walk over. Jo was too far along in her labor, probably almost ready to push. 

“Well your bambino has a full head of hair,” Carina smiled up at Jo, standing and motioning for the nurse standing by the door to come in. “Your baby is ready, I’m sure you will feel the need to push any minute now.”   
Jo’s eyes moved to Alex nervously, her expression practically begging him to help her as she grumbled, “No way, I can’t do this again. I’m not gonna do it, Alex.”

Alex took in Jo’s teary eyes and her scared expression, his hand coming up to brush her hair away from her face. She’d told him last week that she hadn’t been scared to give birth again, but the expression on her face now read otherwise, he knew her well enough to see the fear pasted on her face.

“Hey, you got this, I know you do. You are the strongest person I know,” leaning down towards her, Alex pressed his lips to Jo’s forehead, fingers swiping away the tears staining her cheeks. “You kinda have to have this baby, but I’m here for you to squeeze my hand and yell at as much as you want. Okay?”   
“Okay,” Jo sniffled, one hand coming up to caress Alex’s cheek. “Okay let’s do it.”   
-

“Hey Harps! Come to daddy!”   
Alex Karev didn’t think he’d ever been happier to see his daughter before, the bouncing three year old jumping from Meredith’s grasp on her and running full speed towards him. He hadn’t realized how much she’d grown just in the few months he’d been home, but feeling the solid weight of her in his arms made him realize that Harper was growing faster by the day.

“Daddy, baby?,” Harper’s hazel eyes met Alex’s own, the glint behind them the same curious look he’d seen in Jo time and again. 

“Yeah mommy had the baby, you wanna go see them,” Alex asked, eyes floating to Meredith, who wore a wide grin as she looked at the duo. “Come on, mama wants to see you!”   
Alex and Harper walked the short distance from the waiting room to Jo’s hospital room, both Karevs brimming with excitement as they neared the room. As he opened the door, Alex couldn’t help the way his heart fluttered at the sight of Jo cradling their newborn, their oldest settled on his hip. 

“Hey sweet pea, come here,” Jo’s voice was barely above a whisper as she beckoned Alex and Harper closer to the bed. “You wanna come meet your baby sister?”

Harper eyed the baby in her mom’s arms, a full head of dark brown curls peeking out from the pink hat she wore. The older girl wasn’t sure about the baby, but she still settled into her mom’s side contentedly, one hand reaching out to stroke her sister's cheek.   
“This is your little sister Mila Alexandra, but you can just call her Mila. Can you say hi to her,” Alex looked on as Harper paid careful attention to Mila, her eyes watching the baby curiously as she stretched one tiny arm out of her swaddle to grab Harper’s finger. “I think she likes you.”

He hadn’t pictured this life, never thought he’d get a second chance to fix things with Jo. But staring at his wife and their two daughters, Alex couldn’t help but realize how incredibly lucky he was. He’d come back, he’d fixed things, and he knew that he was going to be leaving any of his girls anytime soon. Jo’s fingers reach up to brush back the already unruly curls from Mila’s face, her wedding rings catching the light from the window as she settles her hand on top of the newborn's chest. 

“Why’re you standing over there? Come join us,” Jo motioned for Alex to come and sit with them, prompting him to settle Harper into his lap as he sat beside Jo. “You know, I’m happy you came back. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”

“Well now you’ll never have to wonder.”


End file.
